"You must call/SMS/text me/us ..."

Question

Hi.If you were asking one of your friends that you were interested to know whether they got their destination/home safe and sound, would it be polite to use must, please? You must call/SMS/text me/us when you get there.

Fivejedjon · Accepted Answer

It's OK.

Odessa Dawn · Answer

You told us in a previous post on other forum that and I quote, "My own feeling is that speakers of BrE tend to use must when the speaker imposes the obligation …". Thus I gathered that I shouldn't use that word if I want to be more polite and to some extended flattered.

Fivejedjon · Answer

Don't take words out of context. I was talking in that other forum about the difference between must and have to. I said:

My own feeling is that speakers of BrE tend to use must when the speaker imposes the obligation and have to when the obligation is externally imposed:
Teacher to student: You must do your homework tonight. (= I, the teacher, order this.)
Mother to son: You have to do your homework tonight. (= Somebody else, the teacher, orders this).

In "You must call/SMS/text me/us when you get there", we do indeed have a speaker-imposed obligation. However, depending on context, this may be interpreted as a direct command or as a form of firm request. We see a similar sort of thing in "You must come and see me when you're in town".

"You must call/SMS/text me/us ..."

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