Writing Task 2 Ielts: Animal Testings. Please give me sincere comments and mark.

Topic: Nowadays animal experiments are widely used to develop new medicines and to test the safety of other products. Some people argue that these experiments should be banned because it is morally wrong to cause animals to suffer, while others are in favor of them because of their benefits to humanity.
Writing:
Nowadays, an increasing number of people are concerned about the purpose that animal testings serve. However, whether they should be ultilised for benefits of humanity or should be stopped for what animals must suffer has caused heated debate. My view is that using animal experiments is necessary.
Firstly, it is obvious that animals are used in important scientific research. This means that researchers are mice, monkeys, rabbits and other animals in their scientific tests to find a variety of vaccines. So, it is necessary to do medical tests on new drugs.
Moreover, animal experiments help to advance medical and scientific knowledge. For example, the scientists have found penicillin antibiotics, Hip replacements, MRI scanning and other breakthroughs after they performed tests on animals. Therefore, many important medical discoveries involved experimentation animals.
That is not to say that animals do not have feelings. Of course, they just like people. In fact, they get hungry and thirsty. They feel fear and pain. It is wrong when they die during the tests. It is not fair to put animals' lives at risk for humans. But, animal testing is the only way to fight disease and make safe products.
In sum, animal experiments have made greater contribution to save thousand of human lives. Meanwhile, we should not neglect animal testing's negative effects. By doing so, we can make sure that researchers aim to minimize the suffering that animals experience. (286 words)

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