Writing task 2 - Cambridge English - Test 6

Topic: At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people.

Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

This is my essay. If possible, which band score is my essay? Many thanks.

Indeed, the population of youngers is indeed higher than the percentage of older people, for instance, East-Souths Asia or West Europe countries. Despite some obvious disadvantages of this trend, I would argue that these are more significant than the advantages.

On the one hand, the young barely accounting of total population has its negative impacts. First of all, it is worth considering the distributed population density among metropolises and countrysides. As the bulk of young people usually private in regions having a crowded and hectic lifestyle for working and living, the demand for food and lodging in metropolises will rise. Another prominent issue of this phenomenon is the young population, leading to an increase in the rate of unemployed. The labour demand is not infinite; hence the supply and demand workforce equilibrium is disrupted, unemployment insurance funds could be stressed out.

On the other hand, there are strong reasons that the benefits are more significant than such disadvantages. One reason for this view that there will have a boost up in the economy. National development would be wonderfully aided by having a highly productive workforce. Another factor to consider is medical system costs. As the proportion of younger adults is higher than the share of older people, resulting in reduced burdens on healthcare systems. Likewise, it is less requiring healthcare services from the young workforces, the government would save much more finance for other factors, instead of health care systems for the older. As the proportion of younger adults is higher than the share of older people, resulting in reduced burdens on healthcare systems. Likewise, it is less requiring healthcare services from the young workforces, the government would save much more finance for other factors, instead of health care systems for the older.

In conclusion, although there have still several negative issues, it seems to me that the advantages of the large population of youngsters instead of the old are more significant than the disadvantages.