0
Trúc Ngọc Posted 8 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Writing task 2

Topic: Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

These day many museums get an entrance cost, but some places have not when people visit to museums. In my opinion, the advantages of admission charge have the better for the development of museums.

One of the principle advantages of the museums are use admission fee for the maintain of artefacts and antiques, and this place can area expansion for display the arts, because of museums have more documents or arts, then made the students have not boring when they visit and can learn more and more about of history of this country. If many museum has not big size, so some artefacts have not displayed and kept in stock, it is not attracting attention of foreign people. This example speaks that about how a reasonable admission charge is advantageous to the operation of a museum

However, the main of problems with admission fee is limit the number of visitor. Some famous museum places, people can to visit to the museums in the same time, however, the number of visitors will be fell compared with admission free. For example, some museums had increased cost income for people visit to the museums, however, this made people can feel uncomfortable and drop number of travelers. Therefore, this is difficult for the introduction of museums to the world, so government must to give a reasonable of income fee for people visit to the museums.

In conclusion, many museums have an admission fee in but some places are not. In my opinion, museums just should have been entrance fee for travelers and not fee for students local or child under 10 years’ old.

  

Top answer

There are some good ideas in that essay but also several problems! 1- Pay attention to basic grammar. For example, “have the better for” is ungrammatical; you should be easily able to rephrase that in a simpler and clearer way.

  • There are some good ideas in that essay but also several problems!
  • 1- Pay attention to basic grammar.
  • For example, “have the better for” is ungrammatical; you should be easily able to rephrase that in a simpler and clearer way.
  • 2- Avoid writing long sentences.
  • The first sentence of your first body paragraph takes up half that paragraph!
Free · every Monday

Get the Weekly English Kit 📬

New words, one handy idiom, and a 2-minute quiz — delivered to your inbox to keep your streak alive.

1 Answers
0

There are some good ideas in that essay but also several problems!

1- Pay attention to basic grammar. For example, “have the better for” is ungrammatical; you should be easily able to rephrase that in a simpler and clearer way.

2- Avoid writing long sentences. The first sentence of your first body paragraph takes up half that paragraph! Write shorter sentences; and again, pay atten

Related Questions