Writing task 1. Please check and mark my writing. thank you!

Question

The graph compares the rate of people who do physical activity usually between six separate age groups in both genders in Australia in 2010.

Overall, in 5 of the 6 age groups females are outnumbered males. Exception is that in the 15 to 24 years group, the proportion of men often do bodily activity not only more than this figure for women but also was the highest value of the male group in the graph.

If look at details, Australian women at the age of 25 to 54 had percentage rose slightly from 48.9% reached a peak of 53.3% and in 2 last groups after 55 years old women’s data decline dramatically, fell by 6.2% in 65 years and over group. By the contrast, the number of men over 45 improved steadily like 43.1%, 45.1% and 46.7% but still were less than figures for women.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

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AlpheccaStars · Answer

The graph compares the rate (wrong word) of ~~people~~ men and women who do regular/daily physical activity usually (wrong word order) between (among) six separate age groups ~~in both genders~~ in Australia in 2010.

Overall, in 5 of the 6 age groups females are outnumbered (wrong form, wrong word. e.g. more females than males did regular exercise. Females usually ) males. (missing word) Exception is that in the 15 to 24 years group, the proportion of men often (wrong word order) do bodily (wrong word) activity not only more than this figure for women but also was the highest value of the male group in the graph. (Ungrammatical sentence)

Model paragraph: In general, females exercised more than their male counterparts in the same age group. The only exception was in the 15-24 age group where there were about 5% more men who exercised than women (52.8% compared to 47.7%). This was the highest value for males among all the six age groups. The male-female gap was greatest in the 35-44 age group, where 39.5% of men exercised regularly compared to 52.5% of women.

~~If look at details,~~ Australian women in at the age range of 25 to 54 had percentage (wrong word order) rose slightly from 48.9% reached a peak of 53.3% and in 2 last groups after 55 years old women’s data (wrong word. Data is plural.) decline dramatically, (comma splice error, missing word) fell by 6.2% in 65 years and over group. By the contrast, the number (wrong word. percentage) of men over 45 improved steadily like 43.1%, 45.1% and 46.7% but still were less than figures for women.

Rates express a change or difference in some value over time or some other standard measure.

Velocity or speed is a rate of distance travelled per unit time: He drove at a rate of 20 km per hour.
An interest rate is the amount of money you will earn per unit of time for a principal amount: If you invest $1000 at an interest rate of 3% per annum, at the end of a year you will have $1030.

An exchange rate is how much money you will get if you change money from one currency to another. The standard measure is the target currency. For example, the amount of money you will get in Vietnamese dong for one US dollar is about 22,800. Exchange rate = 22,800 dong/ USD.

Percentage is a ratio or a fractional value: the amount of something compared to some total amount. For example, in a population, there are approximately 50% males and 50% females. This is NOT a rate.

Hạnh Trần · Answer

The graph compares how many people who traveled by three main British airports over a five-year period between 1998 and 2003. The units are measured in millions of travelers per year.

Overal, what can be seen from the graph is that there are upward trends in the numbers of visitors of all three airports over the period in question. General, Gatwick airport was the leader which often had more travelers than others. The only exception was in 2000 that Heathrow airport had 48.2 million visitors and replaced Gatwick's position.

Looking at the details, Heathrow started with 27.2 million visitors in 1998 which doubled dramatically about 48.2 million in 2000 then fluctuated sharply over the next 3 years. By contrast, the Stansted airport had a sustainable rise from 1998 to 2000 and stayed unchanged at 43.3 million from 2001 until 2003. Except for 2000, Gatwick was the most popular airport and reached a peak of 69.3 million travelers in 2003

Writing task 1. Please check and mark my writing. thank you!

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