Writing Task 1 ( P30)

Question

The given table chart shows the data about the percentage of poeple who spend on 3 diffirent kinds namely: Food/Drinks/Tabaco, Clothing/Footwear, Leisure/Education, in 2002s.

Overall, Turkey was by far the most expenditure among the 5 countries.

It can be seen that, In Turkey, the proportion of people spend on Food/Drinks/Tabaco was the largest in all countries, with a maximum of 32.14%. Following by Turkey, Ireland had with 28.91% of people invovled in this type. At 6.63% of Turk spead on Clothing/Foorwear, and 6.43% for Ireland. The rates of people who spen
d on Leisure/Education of Turkey is twice as big as that of Ireland 4.35% and 2.21%, repectively.

In contrast, In Spain, the rates of people who spend on Food/Drinks/Tabaco at 18.80% and 16.36% in Italy, around 15.77% in Sweden. 9.00% of people used for Clothing/Footwear, compared to 6.51% and 5.4% of people spend on this type in Spain and Sweden. In addition to that, the level of people used for Leisure/Education in Sweden, at 3.22% and 3.20% in Italy. However, the figure for spanish who spend on this field that having 1.98%.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

Your writing is very sloppy and careless. You do not even copy the words off the figure correctly.

This essay shows that you do not understand the table at all. Are there some people in these countries who never buy any food? Then how do they eat? Can you believe that 91% of Italians or 94% of Swedes never buy clothes or shoes? If they never buy clothes, what do they wear?

You make a lot of spelling mistakes.

What band score is your goal?

The ~~given~~ table chart (incorrect. You made exactly the same mistake in your last essay. Don't you learn from your mistakes?) shows the ~~data about the~~ percentage of poeple (Incorrect. The table does not show percentage of people. What does it show?) who spend on 3 diffirent kinds namely: Food/Drinks/Tabaco, Clothing/Footwear, Leisure/Education, in 2002s.

Overall, Turkey was by far the most expenditure among the 5 countries. (What five countries? You did not tell the reader anything about countries.)

~~It can be seen that,~~ In Turkey, the proportion of people (Incorrect. The table does not show proportions of of people. What does it show?) spend on Food/Drinks/Tabaco was the largest in all countries, (All the countries in the world?) ~~with a maximum of~~ 32.14%. Following by Turkey, Ireland had with 28.91% of people (Incorrect. The table does not show percentage of people. What does it show?) invovled in this type. At 6.63% of Turk spead on Clothing/Foorwear, and 6.43% for Ireland. The rates of people (Incorrect. The table does not show rates of people. In fact, there are no rates of any kind in the table.) who spend on Leisure/Education of Turkey is twice as big as that of Ireland 4.35% and 2.21%, repectively.

In contrast, In Spain, the rates of people (Incorrect. The table does not show rates of people. What does it show?) who spend on Food/Drinks/Tabaco at 18.80% and 16.36% in Italy, around 15.77% in Sweden. 9.00% of people used for Clothing/Footwear, compared to 6.51% and 5.4% of people spend on this type in Spain and Sweden. In addition to that, the level of people used for Leisure/Education in Sweden, at 3.22% and 3.20% in Italy. However, the figure for spanish who spend on this field (wrong word) that having 1.98%.

Writing Task 1 ( P30)

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