[Writing task 1] Incomes and spending on food and clothes of one avarage family in a UK city

Question

Please review and give me feedback on my work. Thanks in advance The table provides the amount one family in a city in the UK averagely earns and their specific expenditures on food and clothes in 2010 and 2013. And the pie charts give detailed comparison of spending on five main elements in the two given years.It is easy to comprehend that although household income notably decreased by $4000, the budget allocated for eating and wearing slightly expanded. Spending on food dominantly accounted for more than three quarters in the two given years while expenditures on clothes took up a modest portion and was cut off roughly by half in 2013.An interesting contrast can be seen in eatable products from plants and animals. Although in 2010 meat and fish cost the city’s residents most with 20% spending, the figure drastically fell by 10% and ranked last among food and beverages in 2013. While fruits and vegetables’ share rose significantly from a fifth to a third of total expense in two years and gained the dominant portion.The rest of the expenditures on dairy products and other food and drinks did not witness considerable changes. Food from milk was consumed with 15% of spending in 2010 and rose to 10% in 2013 and other products remained unchanged with 18% over two years.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

The table provides the amount one family (incorrect - it is not the income of one single family. It is the computation of the sum of all the family incomes divided by the number of families.) in a city in the UK averagely (wrong - Averagely cannot be used as a modifier of the verb "earn." e.g. He talks quietly. She eats slowly. The sun shines brightly. There is no way for a person to earn a salary "averagely". It is nonsense. ) earns and their ~~specific~~ expenditures on food and clothes in 2010 and 2013. And the two pie charts give a detailed comparison for those two years of spending on ~~five main elements in the two given years~~. (that makes no sense) clothes and four categories of food, fruits and vegetables; meat and fish; dairy; and other food and drinks.

~~It is easy to comprehend that~~ (Those are filler words that have no content. Only write about the information in the graphic.) Overall, although household income ~~notably~~ decreased ~~by $4000~~, the amounts they spent on food and clothing went up. ~~budget allocated for~~ ~~eating and~~ wearing (wrong word) ~~slightly expanded~~. Spending on food ~~dominantly~~ accounted for more than three quarters in these two ~~given~~ years while expenditures on clothes took up less than a quarter in 2010. That ~~a modest portion~~ ~~and~~ was cut ~~off~~ ~~roughly~~ by nearly half (wrong expression) in 2013.

~~An interesting contrast can be seen in eatable products from plants and animals.~~ (That is a really poor expression. Delete this sentence. It give no information about the data.) Although in 2010 meat and fish cost the city’s residents most with 20% spending, ~~the figure~~ (wrong word.) it ~~drastically~~ fell by 10% and ranked last among food and beverages in 2013. While fruits and vegetables~~’ share~~ rose significantly from a fifth to a third of total expense in two years and gained the dominant portion.

(That is not a sentence. It is a fragment, a dependent clause. "Dominant portion" is not a natural expression.)

The rest of the expenditures on dairy products and other food and drinks did not ~~witness~~ (wrong word. Only poeple witness things, expenditures cannot do this.) have considerable changes. Food from milk (unnatural) ~~was consumed~~ ~~with~~ The amount spent on dairy products was 15% of spending in 2010 and rose to 10% (wrong value) in 2013 and other products remained unchanged at ~~with~~ 18% for both ~~over two~~ years.

Example essay.

In Task 1, it is seldom a good idea to attempt to use synonyms for categories. Synonyms do not have exactly the same definition, but math and science writing must be precise and exact.

Paragraph 1: describe the figure.

Paragraph 2: Overview: Write about 2 or three main features.

Paragraph 3: Write about some details and comparisons.

The figure, consisting of a table and two pie charts, shows the average family income and their expenditures on food and clothing in two years, 2010 and 2013. Specifically, the table lists the earnings and spending in pounds sterling while the pie charts break down this spending into five categories. One category is clothing, and the other four are food items: fruits and vegetables; meat and fish; dairy; and other food and drinks. The data is from one city in the UK.

Overall, the average income of these families decreased by more than 15% over the three years. However, they increased their spending on food but spent less on clothing.

The pie charts show in detail how they divided up their food and clothing budget. For clothing, they spent an average of £3080, equivalent to about 10% of their £29,000 income in 2010. This dropped considerably to £1800, representing a little over 7% of their 2013 earnings of £25,000. In 2010, food represented 78% of the total, and the largest amount, 25%, was for meat and fish, followed by fruits and vegetables at 20%. In 2013, they had cut their spending on meat and fish from £3500 to £2250 or 15% of the total, and instead purchased more fruits and vegetables, which rose from £2800 to £5250, or more than a third of the total. They also increased the amount spent on dairy from £2100 to £3000, nearly one-third more.

[Writing task 1] Incomes and spending on food and clothes of one avarage family in a UK city

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