Writing essays

Please help me! I've been learning English by self-study, so I do hope someone will read my writing and give me some advice. Thank you so much!

Here is the IELTS task:

We cannot help everyone in the world that needs help, so we should only be concerned with our own communities and countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

And my essay:

It is a fact that providing assistance to all people who are in need of help is impossible, so some hold the belief that nations should only address their own issues before taking care of international concerns. Personally, I totally disagree with this point of view while I believe that domestic people are a priority.
There are a variety of reasons why we should cooperate with other countries in order to find out solutions for difficulties they are facing. Firstly, at the age of globalization, all countries have certain effects on one another economically and culturally. So helping others is also a preventative measure for predictable issues. Case in point, in the past, when several European countries had to face a currency crisis, they received a lot of related countries all over the world. Secondly, one problem would be far over the ability of this nation, but others can tackle it easily because every nation has its own strong points. For example, African countries are trying to survive in poverty and numerous children are dying because of starvation and treatable diseases. In this case, the rich worldwide can donate to the charity fund, from clothes to money or pay for social benefit there. Last but not least, it would be really morally wrong if we just ignore unfortunate people while we can help. Because no matter where we live, all people should be cared and shared.
At the same time, communities also need to pay attention to address their difficulties as a priority. There are always people who are in trouble anywhere, not only in poor areas but also in most developed countries. For example, thousands of homeless in the USA are wandering on streets by day by night and they survive on the little amount of money from the government. We can help them without effort because they are right at our doorsteps. Moreover, a government can be concerned with foreign issues if it leaves behind domestic citizens. this situation may result in movements of untreated people which is proved in some countries.
In conclusion, I do not subscribe to the opinion due to some explanations I mentioned above and strongly believe that communities and countries should concern national and international problems together.