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Persian Learner Posted 10 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
Would you check my writing please?
Hi
Hi Jenny, my dear classmate,
I feel great right now because I'm reading an interesting novel on the dormitory balcony.
I couldn't find a better place to read because lazy students laugh at me. I feel less homesick when I read this book.
It's 3:00 o'clock at midnight and I feel sleepy and may fall sleep anytime soon.
I should take a shower. I seldom feel tired but now I am very tired and thirsty. A glass of water will make me better.
Guess what? I went to the university library today to take back that chemistry book, but I didn't bring the book with myself.
It was on the sofa.
However, This dormitory is very boring and there are a lot of lazy people here. I need to study with intelligent people.
Jenny, you are very intelligent and I know you always get top marks. Let's rent an apartment together, and we can pay the rent equally.I know a good real estate agent near the university.I often see it whenever I go to university.
If you like my offer, come over here to talk about it more. Most of the students here commonly go to university at 8:00 a.m. so come here at 9 o'clock. I know that you never want to see them ever in your life and I know you are very punctual, so I am waiting for you at 9:00 sharp.
Looking forward to seeing you soon.
Sara.
I don't want to insert advanced words. I just want to make sure that it's correct grammatically. Thanks.
Hi Jenny, my dear classmate,
I feel great right now because I'm reading an interesting novel on the dormitory balcony.
I couldn't find a better place to read because lazy students laugh at me. I feel less homesick when I read this book.
It's 3:00 o'clock at midnight and I feel sleepy and may fall sleep anytime soon.
I should take a shower. I seldom feel tired but now I am very tired and thirsty. A glass of water will make me better.
Guess what? I went to the university library today to take back that chemistry book, but I didn't bring the book with myself.
It was on the sofa.
However, This dormitory is very boring and there are a lot of lazy people here. I need to study with intelligent people.
Jenny, you are very intelligent and I know you always get top marks. Let's rent an apartment together, and we can pay the rent equally.I know a good real estate agent near the university.I often see it whenever I go to university.
If you like my offer, come over here to talk about it more. Most of the students here commonly go to university at 8:00 a.m. so come here at 9 o'clock. I know that you never want to see them ever in your life and I know you are very punctual, so I am waiting for you at 9:00 sharp.
Looking forward to seeing you soon.
Sara.
I don't want to insert advanced words. I just want to make sure that it's correct grammatically. Thanks.
Top answer
I have underlined some problem areas. (I hope this is not a real letter; some of the attitudes and suggestions expressed are a little strange): Hi Jenny, my dear classmate, I feel great right now because I'm reading an interesting novel on the dormitory balcony. I couldn't find a better place to read because lazy students laugh at me .
- I have underlined some problem areas.
- (I hope this is not a real letter; some of the attitudes and suggestions expressed are a little strange): Hi Jenny, my dear classmate, I feel great right now because I'm reading an interesting novel on the dormitory balcony.
- I couldn't find a better place to read because lazy students laugh at me .
- I feel less homesick when I read this book.
- It's 3:00 o'clock at midnight and I feel sleepy and may fall sleep anytime soon.
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3 Answers
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I have underlined some problem areas. (I hope this is not a real letter; some of the attitudes and suggestions expressed are a little strange):
Hi Jenny, my dear classmate,
I feel great right now because I'm reading an interesting novel on the dormitory balcony.
I couldn't find a better place to read because lazy students laugh at me. I feel less homesick
Hi Jenny, my dear classmate,
I feel great right now because I'm reading an interesting novel on the dormitory balcony.
I couldn't find a better place to read because lazy students laugh at me. I feel less homesick
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No. I've just thought up this letter to help my little sister better memorize new words and their usage in her book. I don't want her to read every single word and its meaning in our native language. I want to make sure I'm giving her correct English.
I hope this is not a real letter
Hi Jenny, my dear classmate,
I feel great right
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...
This dormitory is very boring and there are a lot of lazy people here. I need to study with intelligent people. Jenny, you are very intelligent and I know you always get top marks. Let's rent an apartment together, and we can share the rent. I know a good real estate agent near the university. I often see them/him/her whenever I go to university.
If you like m
This dormitory is very boring and there are a lot of lazy people here. I need to study with intelligent people. Jenny, you are very intelligent and I know you always get top marks. Let's rent an apartment together, and we can share the rent. I know a good real estate agent near the university. I often see them/him/her whenever I go to university.
If you like m
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