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Lisa Brinkmann Posted 7 years ago
Grammar

Word Choice

Which sentence is clearer and a better choice:

This is to confirm that your contents will be packed-out on Monday and Tuesday, September 9 and 10, and the carpet will be installed on Wednesday and Thursday, September 11 and 12 as discussed this week.

or

This is to confirm as discussed this week that your contents will be packed-out on Monday and Tuesday, September 9 and 10, and the carpet will be installed on Wednesday and Thursday, September 11 and 12.

  

Top answer

This should be something like: "This is to confirm that, per our previous discussion, we will remove the furniture from rooms to be carpeted on Sept. 9 and 10, and we will install the carpet on Sept. "

— Anonymous

  • This should be something like: "This is to confirm that, per our previous discussion, we will remove the furniture from rooms to be carpeted on Sept.
  • 9 and 10, and we will install the carpet on Sept.
  • "
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2 Answers
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This should be something like:


"This is to confirm that, per our previous discussion, we will remove the furniture from rooms to be carpeted on Sept. 9 and 10, and we will install the carpet on Sept. 11 and 12."

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contents is not a suitable word here. I suggest items.

Instead of packed-out, say 'shipped'. I think that's what you mean.

I prefer version #2.

Clive

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