Women and men in one Asian country who passed when they took their driving test between 1980 and 2010.

Question

The given chart compares the percentage of people who passed when they take their driving test in one Asian country from 1980 to 2010, with units measured in per cent.

Overall, the survey witnessed the percentage of people passed their driving test increased significantly over the period. Moreover, the figure for women was higher than that of man.

It is evident that the proportion of women passed their driving test was 48% in 1980 before the figure for this saw an increased slightly to 52% in 1990. After that, the amount of women passed the testing drive was highest in the survey, rose significantly to 68% in 2000, and turning to drawback with 64% at the end of the survey (2010).

Turning to the data of man, the proportion of men passed their driving test was 28% in 1980, lower than that of women in the same year. The year 1990 saw an increased significantly to 38% and the figure for this had raised significantly to 49% in 2000. Following in 2010, the figure for this was remained at the end of period.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

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AlpheccaStars · Answer

NguyenDucToan HL The given chart

The ~~given~~ (Do not use "given", "provided" or other such word. It is not natural English. ) chart (What kind of chart is this? Read my advice for types of charts.)

NguyenDucToan HLcompares the percentage of people who passed ~~when they take~~ their driving test

The present tense is wrong because the driving test is in the past. Delete those words.

NguyenDucToan HLin one Asian country from 1980 to 2010

There is no continuous time data. There are only discrete time points, a decade apart. This is not a line graph.

in 1980, 1990, 2000 and 2010.
for each decade from 1980 to 2010

NguyenDucToan HL~~with units measured in per cent~~.

Repetitive. You just wrote that "percentages" are compared. Do not put "percent" twice in the same sentence.

You did not mention that there is data for both men and women, so you did not adequately describe this chart.

Here is a good opening paragraph:

The clustered bar chart compares the percentages of men and women in one Asian country who passed their driving test, each decade between 1980 and 2010.

The title of the chart is "driving test pass rates". You can also use that phrase for the opening paragraph, but I strongly prefer the first one.

The clustered bar chart gives driving test pass rates for both men and women in one Asian country each decade between 1980 and 2010.

Women and men in one Asian country who passed when they took their driving test between 1980 and 2010.

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