Why God Never Received Tenure

Why God Never Received Tenure at Any University
1. He only had one major publication.
2. It was in Hebrew.
3. It had no references.
4. It wasn't published in a referred journal.
5. Some even doubt He wrote it Himself.
6. It may be true that He created the world, but what has He done sincethen?

7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.
8. The scientific community has had a hard time replicating His results.
9. He never applied to the Ethics Board for permission to use humansubjects.

10. When one experiment went awry, He tried to cover it up by drowningthe subjects.

11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, He deleted them from thesample.

12. He rarely came to class, just told students to read the book.
13. Some say He had His son teach the class.
14. He expelled His first two students for learning.
15. Although there were only ten requirements, most students failed Histests.

16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountaintop.
(Source unknown, but my brother just showed me this, so blame him!)

Christopher
http://www.alt-usage-english.org/AUE gallery/chris johnson.html