Whom or Who?

Question

I need your opinion on the usage of the relative pronoun "whom" in this sentence.

Or should it be "who" instead? Is this sentence correct in general? :

Parents are feeling responsible for the bad behaviors of their children whom they wish would grow up for the better later.

(The pronoun "they" right after "whom" of course refers to "the parents".)

Thanks for your input.

CalifJim · Accepted Answer

You need who. They wish that their children (subject of clause) would grow up ...
who is the subject form, not whom.

... of their children who (they wish) would grow up ...
CJ

Jazzmaster · Answer

CalifJimYou need who. They wish that their children (subject of clause) would grow up ...
who is the subject form, not whom.
... of their children who (they wish) would grow up ...
CJ

Thanks CJ.
I thought about that. But I figured otherwise: "they (the parents) wish that their children would grow up" -> "the parents wish that the children (object of the clause) would grow up".

I pulled a couple of sentences from a dictionary:

1. The man whom you just met is a detective.
2. I received a gift from a girl whom I thought did not like me.

So they take "whom" because the relative pronoun must refer to the object of 1. you met, 2. I thought did not like me, which are "the man" and "a girl" respectively. Therefore object form "whom" is more suitable than subject form "who".

Man, these are hard to explain with words ...

jm

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