Which Time to Write is Right?

Question

I feel guilty abandoning my wife to my children in the evening, and it's too late after they finally (if ever) go to sleep to get any writing done.
The mornings seem to work best for me, but I waste so much time unclouding my head that precious little is left before I have to get out and do the day job.
When do you writers of life actually have the life to write?! Morning? on the commute? the bathroom?
John

Usenet · Accepted Answer

[nq:1]The mornings seem to work best for me, but I waste so much time unclouding my head that precious little is left before I have to get out and do the day job.[/nq]
This problem gets easier to deal with if you make a habit of it.

When you first get up two hours earlier, you'll struggle to be productive. But if you keep it up, after a week or two it'll probably start to feel natural.
-Ron

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]I feel guilty abandoning my wife to my children in the evening, and it's too late after they finally (if ... day job. When do you writers of life actually have the life to write?! Morning? on the commute? the bathroom?[/nq]
I can't write when my kids are awake. It needs to be quiet and I can't "zone out" noise. I'm not a morning person so it have to write at night. Usually from about 11 P.M. to 2 (or 3) A.M. I've always been a night owl, even when my job started at 6 A.M I was up till two or three. For most of my adult life I've gotten about 4 or 5 hours of sleep (sometimes 3) per night. Now I find it harder to stay awake in the evening and will take a nap for an hour or so in the chair when I'm pretending to read a book. Or when my wife brings home "Miss Congeniality 2" or "Be Cool" I can "watch" a movie with her and sleep at the same time!
Sleep has to come second.

RonB
"There's a story there...somewhere"

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]I feel guilty abandoning my wife to my children in the evening, and it's too late after they finally (if ... job. When do you writers of life actually have the life to write?! Morning? on the commute? the bathroom? John[/nq]
I think Ron's suggestion, that mornings will become easier with practice, is excellent. As for the evening, if that's preferable, I'd advocate trying to work something out with your family whereby you hang out with them until 10:00pm, at which point (i) you disappear and (ii) they keep quiet (they use headphones for music/TV, keep their voices down, etc.).
If that's impractical/impossible, you could try to find a place in your house or apartment to construct a tiny, sound-proofed office for yourself. Alternatively, if you have a house, you could even buy one of those assemble-it-yourself sheds at Home Depot or Lowes (very cheap), set it up in your backyard, and write out there (insulating it so you can use a portable a/c in summer and a space heater in winter). Fun story for the kids to tell later in life!
-ml

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]I feel guilty abandoning my wife to my children in the evening, and it's too late after they finally (if ... day job. When do you writers of life actually have the life to write?! Morning? on the commute? the bathroom?[/nq]
The biggest issue for me has been clearing my head of the working day crud and concentrating on the subject in hand. Especially as I often feel less than inclined to look at another VDU after eight hours staring at one in work!
I find that 'little and often' is a good way to do it. Set a time, even if it's just an hour a night. During the day, if I hear something or an idea occurs, it gets scrawled down, then when I take my lunch I collate and have a bit of a think while I eat my sandwiches. Taking the tram into work I usually read a book or use the passing scenery to tune out and let my mind drift in lateral ways.If you write in the evening, don't let supper time expand: set a time to write and be there on the dot. Ignore the TV, even if there's something good on: tape it if you really want to see it. When I do get infront of the computer, I've learnt to stay away from the internet: just check the emails and then log off. Paradoxically, to avoid white page fear, I don't dive straight into the current project.

First I'll clatter out whatever's on my mind at that moment, and usually end up with about 500 words about how **** my job is. Point is, it's out of my head now so I don't have to worry about it. Then it's time to take up from where I left off. Do you listen to music while you write? Pick one album or type of music for each project and use it to get in the mood.
Hope the above helps,
Cheers,
Andrew

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]I feel guilty abandoning my wife to my children in the evening, and it's too late after they finally (if ... day job. When do you writers of life actually have the life to write?! Morning? on the commute? the bathroom?[/nq]
You have a wife and kids? ****, I don't have them BECAUSE I like to write in addition to my day job. But give them Sundays and the occasional Saturday and they'll probably be happy.

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]I feel guilty abandoning my wife to my children in the evening, and it's too late after they finally (if ... day job. When do you writers of life actually have the life to write?! Morning? on the commute? the bathroom?[/nq]
Being unencumbered... no wife, no kids... I can write whenever.

I made magic once. Now, the sofa is gone...
www.cafepress.com/dwacon

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]I feel guilty abandoning my wife to my children in the evening, and it's too late after they finally (if ever) go to sleep to get any writing done.[/nq]
It's great that you're concerned about giving your wife a break from the kids and shouldering your part of the parenting! You rock.

Maybe you could make a deal with your wife for the weekends. You give her four hours straight of uninterrupted "Me Time" to do whatever she wants without the kids, and she gives you the same. Then you use your four uninterrupted hours to write.
If you use lunchtime and commute time to sketch out your ideas (you can speak them into a recorder while you drive), then you don't have to waste part of your four hours doing that.
You might think four hours isn't much, but it's better to start with a manageable amount of time and consistently produce quality pages than it is to stress yourself out (and alienate your family) by trying to bogart huge hunks of time.
Lois

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]I feel guilty abandoning my wife to my children in the evening, and it's too late after they finally (if ... day job. When do you writers of life actually have the life to write?! Morning? on the commute? the bathroom?[/nq]
The obvious solution is to get a day job that allows you to write.

Works for me.

Paulo Joe Jingy
Sometimes some things just ain't right.

Which Time to Write is Right?

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