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Bob2010 Posted 16 years ago
Grammar
Which one is more acceptable?
eg(1). The stress of the case took its toll on him. His weight fell sharply. He looked at least ten years older and his voice grew very weak.
eg(2). The stress of the case took its toll on him. His weight fell sharply and he looked at least ten years older and his voice grew very weak.
Q1: Compared with eg(1), is there any difference in the meaning of eg(2) by adding a conjunction 'and' ?
Q2 : Which one is more acceptable? Which one is better in writing?
Thanks for your help
eg(2). The stress of the case took its toll on him. His weight fell sharply and he looked at least ten years older and his voice grew very weak.
Q1: Compared with eg(1), is there any difference in the meaning of eg(2) by adding a conjunction 'and' ?
Q2 : Which one is more acceptable? Which one is better in writing?
Thanks for your help
Top answer
Hi Bob, and welcome to the forums. By setting off "His weight fell sharply" as its own sentence in the first one, you are giving it more importance than the other two factors. " or something like that.
- Hi Bob, and welcome to the forums.
- By setting off "His weight fell sharply" as its own sentence in the first one, you are giving it more importance than the other two factors.
- " or something like that.
- However, in your second one, your sequential "ands" are grammatical, but not great style.
- I would suggest instead (assuming that all three of these elements are equally important) His weight fell sharply, he looked at least ten years older, and his voice grew very weak.
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2 Answers
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Hi Bob, and welcome to the forums.
By setting off "His weight fell sharply" as its own sentence in the first one, you are giving it more importance than the other two factors. It would also read a bit more smoothly with a transition like"Additionally, he looked..." or something like that.
However, in your second one, your sequential "ands" are grammatical, but not great style.
By setting off "His weight fell sharply" as its own sentence in the first one, you are giving it more importance than the other two factors. It would also read a bit more smoothly with a transition like"Additionally, he looked..." or something like that.
However, in your second one, your sequential "ands" are grammatical, but not great style.
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