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English 1b3 Posted 16 years ago
Grammar

Which are ungrammatical? Which is best? Why?

a. The most severe episode lasted approximately twenty hours, the pain centering around my navel.

b. The most severe episode lasted approximately twenty hours, the pain centered around my navel.

c. The most severe episode lasted approximately twenty hours, the pain of which centered around my navel.

d. The most severe episode lasted approximately twenty hours, the pain of which was centered around my navel.

e. The most severe episode lasted approximately twenty hours, whose pain was centered around my navel.

f. The most severe episode lasted approximately twenty hours, whose pain centered around my navel.

Thank you. Emotion: smile
  

Top answer

I'd use only the first one. The present participle would be understood as dynamic, while the past participle (b) would most likely be taken as static. ) I use the terms naturally, not grammatically.

— Avangi

  • I'd use only the first one.
  • The present participle would be understood as dynamic, while the past participle (b) would most likely be taken as static.
  • ) I use the terms naturally, not grammatically.
  • ) The other problem with (b) is that the emboldened part is a stand-alone sentence, which could add to the reader's confusion.
  • " But we're still stuck with a static pain.
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9 Answers
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I'd use only the first one. The present participle would be understood as dynamic, while the past participle (b) would most likely be taken as static. (Maybe that's what you want.) I use the terms naturally, not grammatically. (Navel piercing doesn't usually take twenty hours, does it?)

The other problem with (b) is that the emboldened part is a stand-alone sentence, which could add to t
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Hi, Avangi

I guess my main concern was choosing the correct verb form. Which is correct?

a) The pain centered around my navel.

b) The pain was centered around my navel.

a could be re-written as my first example: the pain centering around...

while b could be re-written as: the pain (of which was) centered around...

A
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Re the ambiguity in b) because of the passive vs. "to be" plus adj., it's just unavoidable with certain verbs. Adding "of which" doesn't seem to change it.
In some cases the meaning works out pretty much the same, in others, not.

In their present forms, a) & b) are both fine, ambiguity notwithstanding.

I may seem to be contradicting my earlier post, but I take the finite a)
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Hi,



Only A and B seem natural to me. I prefer A, since the stress seems to be on the long period of time.



It doesn't seem natural to me to relate the pain to 'the episode', using 'whose' or 'of which', because it seems to suggest that the pain 'belongs to' the episode. It doesn't, to my way of thinking. It belongs to your stomach or at least to the area aro
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I agree with Clive completely, and I apologize for being so lazy. At the time, the examples beyond a) and b) seemed too bizarre to analyze.
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Hi,

I apologize for being so lazy. At the time, the examples beyond a) and b) seemed too bizarre to analyze.
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AvangiRe the ambiguity in b) because of the passive vs. "to be" plus adj., it's just unavoidable with certain verbs. Adding "of which" doesn't seem to change it.

You mustn't be spotting the same ambiguity as me:

The pain centered around... Could mean either

1)The pain of which was centered... (passive)

2) The pain centere
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I just wrote a very long post, but I scrapped it.
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AvangiI just wrote a very long post, but I scrapped it.

I do the same thing. As you write it, you're happy with what you're saying, but then once you've spent the good part of an hour writing it, you realise what you've said just makes you want to throw up
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