What makes narcissists tick

Question

http://www.narcissism.operationdoubles.com/
So that the narcissist can think he seems grand, he must make you seem insignificant by comparison. This is why malignant narcissists act as though it would kill them to compliment you, to thank you for anything, to tell you they love you, to listen to you, to say they're sorry for something, to give you credit for being right about anything, to put their arm around you, to take an interest in anything you do . . . and let's just cut to the chase: they act like it would kill them give you one bit of gratification. They won't even look at you: they pay more attention to a fly on the wall.
They gotta have it all, you see. Nobody ever taught them to share.

Find out what narcissists don't want you to know. Get What Makes Narcissists Tick. But treating you like you're nothing is just one of many ways they act out their fantasy that they are so grand that you are dirt under their feet. So, look out. Delusions of grandeur are hard to maintain and are constantly challenged by reality.

Usenet · Accepted Answer

[nq:1]http://www.narcissism.operationdoubles.com/ So that the narcissist can think he seems grand, he must make you seem insignificant by comparison. This is ... dirt under their feet. So, look out. Delusions of grandeur are hard to maintain and are constantly challenged by reality.[/nq]
That's really interesting, Skip. I never realized that all you really wnated was for me to pay attention to you.
Oh, wait.

Usenet · Answer

[nq:2]http://www.narcissism.operationdoubles.com/ So that the narcissist can think he seems grand, ... are hard to maintain and are constantly challenged by reality.[/nq]
[nq:1]That's really interesting, Skip. I never realized that all you really wnated was for me to pay attention to you. Oh, wait.[/nq]
What'd you do, tape that comeback at an 8th grade ball game?

Usenet · Answer

Capt. Oblivious:
[nq:1]Find out what narcissists don't want you to know.[/nq]
Holy pathological psychological projection, Batman! You really can't script this any better... Skip, you're downright scary! But at least now - due to your efforts to educate - we have a name for your condition.
The good new for you is that therapy is possible. It appears that NPD (your condition, see below) is a particularly hard mental condition to deal with, but at least it looks like therapy might help you. So... snap to it, soldier!
Fun with Google:
Nuisance called name-dropping
http://www.tribuneindia.com/2007/20071001/edit.htm#5

NAME-DROPPING is a practice of knowingly inserting references of famous people or institutions into a conversation in order to seem more important to the listener. Though it is considered a negative or even an offensive quality, many people see it to be an interesting art. All of us in our lives have met such persons who at the slightest pretext punctuate their talk by putting big names or high connections irrespective of the need and context.

Psychologists view name-dropping as a behavioral disorder arising out of hidden inferiority complex. Many times name-dropping becomes a compulsive habit where a man by sheer luck achieves something which he doesn't deserve.
..
Compulsive Lying
http://www.truthaboutdeception.com/confront a liar/public/compulsive lying.html

A compulsive liar will resort to telling lies, regardless of the situation. Again, everyone lies from time to time (see, when lovers lie), but for a compulsive liar, telling lies is routine; it becomes a habit and a way of
life.
Simply put, for a compulsive liar, lying becomes second nature.

Not only do compulsive liars bend the truth about issues large and small, but they take comfort in it. Lying feels right to a compulsive liar. Telling the truth, on the other hand, is difficult and uncomfortable for a compulsive liar to do.
And like any other behavior which provides comfort and an escape from discomfort (i.e., alcohol, drugs, ***), lying can become addictive and hard to stop. For the compulsive liar, lying feels safe and this fuels the desire to lie even more.
Making matters even more complicated, compulsive lying is often a symptom of a much larger personality disorder, which only makes the problem more difficult to resolve (see, NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER and borderline personality disorder).
Unfortunately, compulsive lying is hard for the person involved to see, but it hurts those who are around it. Compulsive lying, if not addressed, can easily destroy a relationship (for example, see why does he need to lie).
Compulsive lying can be dealt with through counseling or therapy. But, like many addictive behaviors (and/or personality disorders), getting someone to admit they have a problem with lying is the difficult part. Sadly enough, getting someone to recognize that he or she has a problem usually requires hitting rock
bottom first.
..
Narcissistic personality disorder
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic personality disorder

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), is a personality disorder defined by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM IV-R), the diagnostic classification system used in the United States, as "a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and a lack of empathy."

Pathological narcissism occurs in a spectrum of severity. In its more extreme forms, it is narcissistic personality disorder. NPD is considered to result from a person's belief that he or she is flawed in a way that makes the person fundamentally unacceptable to others. This belief is held below the person's
conscious awareness; such a person would typically deny thinking such a thing, if questioned. In order to protect themselves against the intolerably painful rejection and isolation that (they imagine) would follow if others recognised their supposedly defective nature, such people make strong attempts to control others' view of them and behaviour towards them.

People who are overly narcissistic commonly feel rejected, humiliated and threatened when criticised. To protect themselves from these dangers, they often react with disdain, rage, and/or defiance to any slight criticism, real or imagined. To avoid such situations, some narcissistic people withdraw socially and may feign modesty or humility.
Though individuals with NPD are often ambitious and capable, the inability to tolerate setbacks, disagreements or criticism, along with lack of empathy, make it difficult for such individuals to work cooperatively with others or to maintain long-term professional achievements. With narcissistic personality disorder, the person's perceived fantastic grandiosity, often coupled with a hypomanic mood, is typically not commensurate with his or her real accomplishments.

The exploitativeness, sense of entitlement, lack of empathy, disregard for others, and constant need for attention inherent in NPD adversely affect interpersonal relationships.

Gabbard saw the "hypervigilant" subtype as easily hurt, oversensitive and ashamed. He suggested that the hypervigilant subtype, far from fending off devaluation, is obsessed with it, neutralising devaluation by seeing others as unjust abusers.

Treatment and prognosis
Most psychiatrists and psychologists regard NPD as a relatively stable condition when experienced as a primary disorder. James F. Masterson's outlines a prominent approach to healing NPD, while discusses a continuum of severity and the kinds of therapy most effective in different cases. Typically, as narcissism is an ingrained personality trait, rather than a chemical imbalance, medication and therapy are not very effective in treating the disorder. Schema Therapy, a form of therapy developed by Jeffrey E. Young that integrates several therapeutic approaches (psychodynamic, cognitive, behavioral etc.), also offers an approach for the treatment of NPD.
It is unusual for people to seek therapy for NPD. Subconscious fears of exposure or inadequacy are often met with defensive disdain of therapeutic processes

Usenet · Answer

[nq:1]NAME-DROPPING is a practice of knowingly inserting references of famous people or institutions into a conversation in order to seem more important to the listener.[/nq]
George Clooney and Steven Spielberg both said exactly that to me just last week!
I've met Alan Brooks, too. Did I mention that?

"The easiest thing to do on earth is not write."
? William Goldman

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Hi,
For a more detailed view of pathological narcissism and the Narcissistic
Personality Disorder (NPD) - click on these links:

http://malignantselflove.tripod.com/npdglance.html

http://malignantselflove.tripod.com/narcissismglance.html

Other Personality Disorders
http://malignantselflove.tripod.com/faqpd.html
Pathological Narcissism and Other Mental Health Disorders

http://malignantselflove.tripod.com/faq82.html
Click on these links for detailed topic guides - everything you ever wanted
to know about narcissists and psychopaths:

Toxic Relationships with Malignant Narcissists and Psychopaths

The Narcissist and Psychopath in Society

The Narcissist and Psychopath as Criminals
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/narcissisticabuse/message/5003

The Narcissist is Above the Law
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/narcissisticabuse/message/4983

The Narcissist as Liar and Con-man
http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/narcissisticabuse/message/4951

Pathological Narcissism, Narcissistic Personality disorder and Psychopathy

Usenet · Answer

[nq:2]That's really interesting, Skip. I never realized that all you really wnated was for me to pay attention to you. Oh, wait.[/nq]
[nq:1]What'd you do, tape that comeback at an 8th grade ball game?[/nq]
Watch out. I've heard he knows Bob. THAT Bob.

What makes narcissists tick

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