wedding money in Canada or USA

Question

In general, when two people in Canada or USA are getting married, how will their families contribute money to the wedding? Thanks.

Clive · Accepted Answer

Hi,

The tradition is that the bride's parents pay for everything.

However, I'd say this is changing. One reason is that weddings are becoming extremely expensive. Another is that people are getting married older, and thus often have established and well-paying careers with money in the bank.

At least in Canada's multi-cultural setting, newer ethnic groups may have other traditions that they follow.

In Canada, we also have legalized same-*** marriages. For these, I have no idea who pays.

Best wishes, Clive

Osee · Answer

Why bride's parents should pay for everything in the tradition of Canada?

In China, our tradition is bridegrooms or their parents pay everything because a marriage to a woman means kind of devoting the rest her life to assitant her husband and bridegrooms or their parents even should pay back some money as a gift to the brides' parents before wedding. There is also a saying in China, if a man does not have a appropriate amount of money, he should not expect marriage. Of course, these are just a kind of tradition, some people follow and others do not.

Same-*** marriage is still rare in China. It is NOT illegal in China, yet most people in China regard it as abnormal.

Clive
Hi,

The tradition is that the bride's parents pay for everything.

However, I'd say this is changing. One reason is that weddings are becoming extremely expensive. Another is that peopl are getting married iolder, and thus often have established and well-paying careers with money in the bank.

At least in Canada's multi-cultural setting, newer ethnic groups may have other traditions that they follow.

In Canada, we also have legalized same-*** marriages. For these, I have no idea who pays.

Best wishes, Clive

Clive · Answer

Hi,

Such things are matters of custom and cultures. There are many countries and cultures in which the bride's parents pay.

Clive

Anonymous · Answer

In the US, the bride's family pays for the dress, wedding, reception and hosts the rehearsal dinner.

The bridegroom's family pays for the flowers, and refreshments (bar).

But, as stated before, some of the couples are paying for the weddings themselves, especially if they are working or have lived together before the wedding.

The main thing is: Don't get in debt because of your wedding!

BarbaraPA · Answer

I have to strongly disagree with the statement that the bride's family hosts the rehearsal dinner and the groom's family pays for the bar.

The "tradition" (which as has already been said, it no longer quite so customary) is that the bride's family pays for everything except the flowers (as you said) and GROOM's family hosts the rehearsal dinner. I have never, never in my entire career of attending weddings been to a rehearsal dinner hosted by the bride or her family, although everything else has been divided up every which way as time goes on.

In my own wedding, the groom's father felt strongly about having a live band instead of a DJ, which was in our budget, so he paid for the band. My parents paid for the reception otherwise. I paid for my own dress and I honestly don't remember who paid for the flowers.

Osee · Answer

May I further ask how this tradition comes in Canada or USA?

BTW, I am trying to understand the word rehearal used here. Does it mean a group of people? So rehearsal dinner is just a dinner enjoyed by a group of people? Thanks a lot.

BarbaraPA · Answer

Once upon a time, the rehearsal dinner was for the actual members of the wedding party and their spouses (if there were any). With a Saturday wedding, you would have a rehearsal on Friday night - making sure everyone knew who would stand where at what time, etc. Then after the rehearsal, you would go out for a nice dinner. This has expanded over time to include other out-of-town guests if the groom's family wants to include them, and family members not in the wedding, etc. Some of the rehearsal dinners I've been to have been a more elaborate meal than the wedding reception (just not cake or dancing). But again, it's always been the groom's family who hosts, not the bride's.

Just as a side note, when my sister got married, I was her maid of honor. Apparently there was a tradition there that it was bad luck for the bride to do the rehearsal, so she sat in the front pew and watched, and as the made of honor, I stood in for her at the rehearsal. That was interesting. I've never encountered that before. Another cute tradition is that at the bride's wedding shower, she saves the bows from the gifts, and makes them into a bunch that stands in as the bouquet of flowers at the rehearsal. Since you actually practice handing the bouquet to the maid of honor while you join hands for the actual ceremony and such, it makes sense to have something to practice with.

Isaacoomber1 · Answer

Hello,

I completely agree and Canada is one of the best place for wedding.....

Thanks,
(link removed by moderator)

Anonymous · Answer

Hi,
Traditionally in Canadian families of European/British descent, the Bride's parents pay for costs related to the reception, the Bride's dress, invitations, and decorations except for flowers.
The groom's family pays for flowers and hosts the rehearsal dinner.
The wedding party pay for their own attire
The groom pays for the engagement ring and his own attire, bridesmaids pay for their own hair to be done- etc.
Bride and groom pay for the gifts they give to their wedding party- usually a small token of appreciation.
I am not sure about the wedding bands, or the marriage license these may be split by the bride and groom or provided by the groom.

If the parents pay then both sets of parents names are included on the invitations (as the hosts). More recently, engaged couples are paying for their own weddings or splitting the costs with parents- usually both sets of parents will contribute something to offset the costs.
I would however consult an etiquette book from each country just to be sure- and it is a good idea to sit down with both sets of parents to discuss the financial arrangements.
Also, usually each set of parents is allowed to invite a certain number of their friends to the wedding, which may be limited by the couple if the parents are not contributing to the wedding, or if the contribution is minimal (i.e. one or two couples each). You will want to discuss this with parents when making the guest list, or you may end up with guests you weren't expecting on the wedding day.

wedding money in Canada or USA

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