Valentine's Day Competition

0 00THESE ARE ENTRIES TO A WASHINGTON POST COMPETITION ASKING FOR A RHYME WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE, BUT THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE:02br
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00Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss02br
00But I only slept with you, because I was pissed.02br
00*************************02br
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00I thought that I could love no other02br
00Until, that is, I met your brother.02br
00**************************02br
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00Roses are red, violets are blue,02br
00sugar is sweet, and so are you.02br
00But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,02br
00the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.02br
00**************************02br
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00Of loving beauty you float with grace,02br
00If only you could hide your face.02br
00****************************02br
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00Kind, intelligent, loving and hot,02br
00This describes everything you are not.02br
00******************************02br
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00I want to feel your sweet embrace,02br
00But don't take that paper bag off of your face.02br
00*******************************02br
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00I love your smile, your face, and your eyes --02br
00Damn, I'm good at telling lies!02br
00************************************02br
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00My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife --02br
00Marrying you screwed up my life.02br
00************************************02br
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00I see your face when I am dreaming,02br
00That's why I always wake up screaming.02br
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00My love, you take my breath away --02br
00What have you stepped in to smell this way?02br
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00My feelings for you no words can tell,02br
00Except for maybe "Go To Hell."02br
00*************************************02br
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00What inspired this amorous rhyme? --02br
00Two parts vodka, one part lime!0-