Urgent Scholarship Motivation Letter - please give me your thoughts on it !

Hello everyone !

I'd like to thank you all for the great forum and for carrying the mission to help others - it is amazing how many good people are there once you open your eyes for them.

I have a Dutch scholarship motivation letter here - been writing it all day and I just can't tell which part is to be taken off already - they all seem so important to me right now. I took advantage of the letters of people who already received advice from members of the forum, but still my motivation letter needs to be revised. So I would be really grateful if someone can help me with this one - it is the first of its kind that I ever wrote and it is due Monday, so this really is a urgent case for me.

Here it is:

Dear Sirs:

I am writing to you to apply for the XX Scholarship Programme for the 2008/2009 academic year.

I hold a Bachelor Degree in Hospitality Management from XX College, Bulgaria. This programme was conducted in collaboration with the XX University,the Netherlands where I spent one semester during my second year of education, so after graduating in 2005 I was awarded both Bulgarian and Dutch diplomas in HoReCa Management.

Being an international student in XX and having the chance to get acquainted with the interactive approach of the Dutch educational system and its focus on teamwork, I realized the importance of self-study and self-discipline. During my internship I had the chance to practice many techniques, including the internationally acclaimed Dutch Problem-Based Learning system, which trained my analytical skills and my ability to independently solve practical problems, developing a creative business mind. In addition, Dutch history, culture and language are matters that have really fascinated me and that I was keen on learning about in person. Overall, this experience made me more convinced that I really would like to undertake a business management career and that I am able to adapt easily to any educational atmosphere and successfully be part of a team.

My Bachelor degree curricula focused on both theoretical knowledge and practical training, thus building up the professional qualities of modern managers and highly qualified market oriented specialists. Through my studies I became fascinated with issues that affect hospitality industry development worldwide and the future of Bulgarian tourist market in particular.

My diploma assignment was a consultancy project for a real operating establishment in the sphere of the hospitality industry. The successful completion of the project was based on research and analysis on the new political, economical, technical, cultural and social circumstances in my country that affect the Hospitality industry and the capacity growth of the Bulgarian tourist market. After profound Macro- and Microanalysis of the place of operation of the establishment in mind, a SWOT analysis was prepared, thus the opportunities and threats in front of the hotel and its strong and weak aspects had been determined. Based on the information acquired, we - the project team - gave advice and offered different strategic options to be implemented in the hotel, so as to improve its current performance on the tourist market in the following three years. As time passed, I may proudly state that the suggested strategies were not only feasible to the hotel, but also led it to the present position of a ‘top player’ in terms of product and service levels on the Bulgarian hospitality market.

Parallel with my educational endeavours, the number of years of experience working in diverse positions and companies in three different countries – Bulgaria, the Netherlands, the USA - with completely different work environments and cultures, have broadened my outlook and allowed me to “put the theory into practice”. In the last years I have become an executive supervisor of a couple of restaurants, including a freshly opening one. Running every phase of a new business was thoroughly engrossing and exciting for me as I have always dreamt of being an entrepreneur. I studied the strategies of successful business owners and developed business models tailored specifically to this one, since I was responsible for all business matters, including administrative, financial, human resources, personnel training and marketing functions.

Nevertheless, I have always endeavored to upgrade my education in the field of business with a strong focus on people management, business cultures and entrepreneurship. The XX programme of XX University best suites me because it offers many courses that are specifically related to areas of my interest - decision making, international market research, international entrepreneurship, intercultural management, business in the European Union. This Master Degree programme is a unique joint programme between XX, the Netherlands and YY, UK, designed for students with a wide interest in international business and management, who are aiming at a senior management position. I am also drawn to the XX programme because of its emphasis on technology, reflected by such innovative courses as ICT for the E-Business Environment. I believe obtaining such knowledge is critical to my objectives and will provide the necessary background for me to be prepared to anticipate and react to ever - changing environments. I value the fact that at XX entrepreneurial education does not stop at the classroom, but rather continues through internships and extracurricular activities. I feel that a business school for entrepreneurs should balance theory with real-world application, and the XX's curriculum and opportunities for hands-on training through associations, internships, and field study provide such balance. Furthermore, the University's profusion of student groups, in addition to its elective courses, will allow me to tailor my course of study directly to my career interests and provide me the confidence and contacts to realize my dreams. It is precisely this flexibility upon which I plan to draw while at XX University and beyond, by taking advantage of - and contributing to - the University's strong international alumni network.

At the present moment, I have been accepted as a full-time student for the Master XX programme at XX University, the Netherlands and will begin studying in the academic year 2008/2009, starting September 2008. I am very exited by my decision to pursue my Master’s Degree in the Netherlands and at XX University in particular. I believe that their approach will enable me to acquire knowledge and skills that will help me meet new professional challenges.

With a solid foundation in academic theory on international management and intensive research gained through the Master’s Degree program in XX at XX University, I am confident that I will have the skills, knowledge and contacts that will enable me, as a manager and entrepreneur, to deal with the complex issues of the Hospitality industry condition in my country.

Thank you very much for considering my request. I look forward to your positive response.

Sincerely yours,

me

Thank you in advance! I will be expecting your comments.

I really hope I'm not posting this twice...If so - please excuse my forum-wise incompetence.