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Vincent tee Posted 21 years ago
Grammar

urgent letter. Please Help. Arguing with my agency

Can somebody please refine my below letter into a better style and check if there is any gramatical error.

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Hi Rebecca,

$600 increment sounds better instead of $200.

Come on, I’m performing better and better each day. You must understand my circumstances instead of viewing on other people point of view. Ok I ask you a question; do you really perform very well when you start to join a new company in a short duration? I doubt you’ll say yes right. If I’m not wrong of course you’re not performing that well because you need to slowly adopt and understand those company processes step by step till you get a better understanding and get a bigger picture right?.

Don’t tell me you don’t make any mistakes at the beginning. I’m sure you did. So that’s normal human cycle. We’ trying and hoping to mitigate our mistakes as much as possible each day and to increase our value and performance to the next level in our company right?

First of all you guys must understand my situation of how am I going to cope up with tons of unfamiliar information that was given by Susan. Susan didn’t give well explanation and she was expecting me to know all things in a short period. That’s impossible but I did it. That’s literally impossible for anybody unless we’re used to those processes.

Alright I’ll prove my performance to you next 2 weeks, just phone Susan whenever you like and I’ll screen shot some of the team members’ feedback on my good performance from the email to you.

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Thanks to this forum's member,

Vincent
  

Top answer

I will approach your request primarily from a grammatical point-of-view, with a little softening of the tone. Hi Rebecca, A $600 increment sounds better than a $200 increment . Please consider that I’m performing better and better each day.

  • I will approach your request primarily from a grammatical point-of-view, with a little softening of the tone.
  • Hi Rebecca, A $600 increment sounds better than a $200 increment .
  • Please consider that I’m performing better and better each day.
  • Try to see the situation from my point-of-view.
  • I ask you this question: does anyone really perform very well immediately after joining a new company ?
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1 Answers
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I will approach your request primarily from a grammatical point-of-view, with a little softening of the tone.

Hi Rebecca,

A $600 increment sounds better than a $200 increment.

Please consider that I’m performing better and better each day. Try to see the situation from my point-of-view. I ask you this question:

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