Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
I got super off-topic, how should I narrow this down and focus on the challenge, I am also over 100 words on this essay.
Ever since I was little I was expected to be someone I’m not. I was expected to fit the stereotype of who I look like. I was supposed to write pretty like a girl, or do “girly” sports instead of doing t-ball.
I remember my father taking me out of T-ball because he thought i didn’t enjoy it, being the only girl on the team and put me into cheerleading, following the “norm” of society. Little did I know that even though i was doing what society expected me to do I would continue to be stereotyped.
Dumb. Snobby. Fake. You name it. I was called just about everything negative you can think of, not because that’s who i am or how i acted but merely because i was a cheerleader. I mostly brushed it off because that’s just how everything was.
In my time in high school i specifically excelled in math and science classes. And people would always make comments like “wow i didn’t think you would be smart, aren’t you a cheerleader?” Which amazed me because i saw absolutely no correlation between cheerleading and my academic performance.
Eventually I quit cheer to focus on my academics my sophomore year, but the stereotyping didn’t stop because I was still a girl. The first time I entered the meeting for the Math and Science UIL team I was one of two girls there, and everyone was shocked to see me there, even the coaches. For some reason, even in today's society of “equalness” it was still abnormal to see a girl interested in STEM. I was dedicated to this subject and so i often challenged myself and found myself competing against my own male teammates, usually scoring higher than them of course. Eventually I became the treasurer of the club my Junior year, and Vice President my senior year.
I felt out of place in most of my STEM classes, and sometimes I even questioned myself, Can I really do this? Should I just become a teacher or a housewife like everyone else in my family? Everyday I am expected to live this life that everyone has had before me. But I don't want to do that and I want to be an innovator and leader and beat the odds and become a woman in STEM. I want to make a difference in young womens life who are going through this same problem to show them that it is possible despite the labels people put on you because of your activities and appearance! Sadly, this challenge will never be over but for now I have gotten over the fear of standing out and feeling out of place because I know bigger plans await me in the future of STEM.
Eliminate the last paragraph with the exception of the last sentence. You have gotten off topic there. You need to make quite a few grammatical corrections.
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Eliminate the last paragraph with the exception of the last sentence. You have gotten off topic there. You need to make quite a few grammatical corrections. The language is too casual for the occasion. You need to capitalize the word "I," and you have some mixed constructions/lack of parallel structure. This reads like a a very rough draft, a first write.
I remember my father takin