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Hela Posted 21 years ago
Grammar
Translation Fr-Eng
0 Dear Mr Pedantic and Calif Jim, 02 br
02 br
00 Would you please have a look at my translation ? How can it be improved so that it becomes “excellent” ? I think that my English text is too close to the French one and not idiomatic enough. 02 br
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00 Il n’y a pas très longtemps, on encourageait les consommateurs des pays industrialisés à acheter et même à gaspiller de plus en plus de biens, « Plus on jette à la poubelle, plus on prospère » étant le slogan qui avait alors cours. Pendant ce temps, dans les pays en voie de développement, une grande partie de la population était sous-alimentée. Des spécialistes de l’Institut de Technologies du Massachusetts et puis le Club de Rome (qu’est-ce que c’est?) ont mis en garde le monde industriel contre la croissance illimitée; mais la devise: « Ce qui est petit est beau » n’a pas vraiment convaincu, et des hommes et des femmes qui mangent trop continuent à prodiguer temps et argent pour essayer de garder la ligne. 02 br
00 Certains sont prêts à donner une aide en argent, denrées alimentaires et conseillers techniques, quand, de temps à autre, les médias leur rappellent que des dizaines de gens meurent de faim tous les jours. 02 br
00 Peut-être faut-il de l’imagination pour aborder ce problème et le résoudre. Puisque les terres agricoles fertiles sont rares, il dépend de nous de les gérer avec soin. 02 br
02 br
00 Le Monde, décembre 1990 02 br
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00 Not so long ago (does the phrase “way long ago” exist ?), consumers of / in industrialized countries were encouraged not only to buy but even to waste more and more goods. “The more we waste, the more we prosper” was the prevailing slogan then / was the slogan which was prevailing then. In the meantime, in developing countries, a large / major part of the (world ?) population was underfed. Specialists of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology and the Club of Rome (?) warned the industrial world (?) against the unlimited growth, but the credo which said / says (?) “What is small is beautiful” was not really convincing / had not really convinced and men and women who eat too much keep on spending time and money trying to remain slim / to watch their figure. 02 br
02 br
00 Some are ready to give / send financial aid, food and technical advisors when, now and then, the media remind them that several (?) people die every day of hunger. 02 br
02 br
00 A … of imagination (is there a partitive that can be used with “imagination” here ? Something like “a touch of” = un brin d’imagination) might be needed to deal with then / and solve that problem. Given that / Since fertile / productive farms are rare, it is up to us to manage them with care. 02 br
02 br
00 Thank you for your help, 02 br
00 Hela 0-
02 br
00 Would you please have a look at my translation ? How can it be improved so that it becomes “excellent” ? I think that my English text is too close to the French one and not idiomatic enough. 02 br
02 br
00 Il n’y a pas très longtemps, on encourageait les consommateurs des pays industrialisés à acheter et même à gaspiller de plus en plus de biens, « Plus on jette à la poubelle, plus on prospère » étant le slogan qui avait alors cours. Pendant ce temps, dans les pays en voie de développement, une grande partie de la population était sous-alimentée. Des spécialistes de l’Institut de Technologies du Massachusetts et puis le Club de Rome (qu’est-ce que c’est?) ont mis en garde le monde industriel contre la croissance illimitée; mais la devise: « Ce qui est petit est beau » n’a pas vraiment convaincu, et des hommes et des femmes qui mangent trop continuent à prodiguer temps et argent pour essayer de garder la ligne. 02 br
00 Certains sont prêts à donner une aide en argent, denrées alimentaires et conseillers techniques, quand, de temps à autre, les médias leur rappellent que des dizaines de gens meurent de faim tous les jours. 02 br
00 Peut-être faut-il de l’imagination pour aborder ce problème et le résoudre. Puisque les terres agricoles fertiles sont rares, il dépend de nous de les gérer avec soin. 02 br
02 br
00 Le Monde, décembre 1990 02 br
02 br
02 br
00 Not so long ago (does the phrase “way long ago” exist ?), consumers of / in industrialized countries were encouraged not only to buy but even to waste more and more goods. “The more we waste, the more we prosper” was the prevailing slogan then / was the slogan which was prevailing then. In the meantime, in developing countries, a large / major part of the (world ?) population was underfed. Specialists of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology and the Club of Rome (?) warned the industrial world (?) against the unlimited growth, but the credo which said / says (?) “What is small is beautiful” was not really convincing / had not really convinced and men and women who eat too much keep on spending time and money trying to remain slim / to watch their figure. 02 br
02 br
00 Some are ready to give / send financial aid, food and technical advisors when, now and then, the media remind them that several (?) people die every day of hunger. 02 br
02 br
00 A … of imagination (is there a partitive that can be used with “imagination” here ? Something like “a touch of” = un brin d’imagination) might be needed to deal with then / and solve that problem. Given that / Since fertile / productive farms are rare, it is up to us to manage them with care. 02 br
02 br
00 Thank you for your help, 02 br
00 Hela 0-
Top answer
0 Not so long ago consumers in industrialized countries were encouraged to buy, even to waste, more and more goods. "The more we throw away, the more we prosper" was the slogan of the day. At the same time, a large part of the population in developing nations was undernourished.
- 0 Not so long ago consumers in industrialized countries were encouraged to buy, even to waste, more and more goods.
- "The more we throw away, the more we prosper" was the slogan of the day.
- At the same time, a large part of the population in developing nations was undernourished.
- Specialists from MIT (the Massachusetts Institute of Technology) and then the Club of Rome cautioned the industrial world about unlimited growth, but the motto "Smaller is better" was never very persuasive, and overweight men and women continue to spend inordinate amounts of time and money trying to stay in shape.
- 02 br 00 Some are willing to contribute money, food, or technical advice when the media remind them from time to time how many people die of starvation every day.
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4 Answers
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0 Not so long ago consumers in industrialized countries were encouraged to buy, even to waste, more and more goods. "The more we throw away, the more we prosper" was the slogan of the day. At the same time, a large part of the population in developing nations was undernourished. Specialists from MIT (the Massachusetts Institute of Technology) and then the Club of Rome cautioned the industrial
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0 "consumers 01 i 00 in 02 i 00 ... countries" is what you need. 02 br
00 "consumers of X" are those who consume X. They aren't consuming the countries! 02 br
02 br
00 "... was prevailing then" won't work well. Not recommended. "prevailing slogan" is better. 02 br
00 "large" or "major" - either OK. 02 br
00 "credo" doesn't work
00 "consumers of X" are those who consume X. They aren't consuming the countries! 02 br
02 br
00 "... was prevailing then" won't work well. Not recommended. "prevailing slogan" is better. 02 br
00 "large" or "major" - either OK. 02 br
00 "credo" doesn't work
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0 Dear Calif Jim, 02 br
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00 Thank you for your help. Before studying your translation carefully I have some questions for you, if you wouldn't mind. 02 br
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00 1) Is it correct to say "INDUSTRIAL world" or should I say "INDUSTRIALISED world" ? 02 br
02 br
00 2) Is there a difference between "underfed" and "undernourished" ? 02 br
02 br
00 Thank you for your help. Before studying your translation carefully I have some questions for you, if you wouldn't mind. 02 br
02 br
00 1) Is it correct to say "INDUSTRIAL world" or should I say "INDUSTRIALISED world" ? 02 br
02 br
00 2) Is there a difference between "underfed" and "undernourished" ? 02 br
00
0 1) Is it correct to say "INDUSTRIAL world" or should I say "INDUSTRIALISED world" ? 02 br
02 br
00 "industrialised" is the standard expression. 02 br
02 br
00 2) Is there a difference between "underfed" and "undernourished" ? 02 br
02 br
00 Yes. If I still feel hungry after eating, I feel underfed! But I'm certainly not undernourished, which
02 br
00 "industrialised" is the standard expression. 02 br
02 br
00 2) Is there a difference between "underfed" and "undernourished" ? 02 br
02 br
00 Yes. If I still feel hungry after eating, I feel underfed! But I'm certainly not undernourished, which
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