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Anonymous Posted 11 years ago
Grammar

This sentence feels a little bit clumsy...

Hi!
This sentence feels a little bit clumsy...

During the festival all performers will have live music performances with no phonograms, therefore visitors of the event will attend concerts of high quality.

Can I improve it somehow?

Thanks a lot!


  

Top answer

Suggestion: have give live performances. Necessary: semicolon instead of comma before therefore . My question: I'm not familiar with 'phonogram' in this context; do you mean 'microphone'?

— Philip

  • Suggestion: have give live performances.
  • Necessary: semicolon instead of comma before therefore .
  • My question: I'm not familiar with 'phonogram' in this context; do you mean 'microphone'?
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2 Answers
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Suggestion: have give live performances. Necessary: semicolon instead of comma before therefore. My question: I'm not familiar with 'phonogram' in this context; do you mean 'microphone'?
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Perhaps Anon was thinking of "phonograph", meaning to say that none of the music was pre-recorded?

If so, of course "phonograph" would be too antiquated a word to use.
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