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Nambluee Posted 8 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

This is the first time i have ever done the IELTS writing section 1. Please give me all of your constructive comments on what i need to improve more. Thanks a lot in advance.

The line graph illustrates “Istanbul Promo plus” sales in a duration of 12 months starting from January of 2007. It is evident that the company saw a considerable fluctuation in the statistic of sales during this period.

The company got a set-out with 200 millions of Turkish lira turnover right in the head of the year and seemed to have a slight increase to 225 millions in the following month. The highlight of this chart is probably the number of total sales in March, which is a significant breakthrough when it reached the point of 350 millions of Turkish lira. Just for one month, there was the attenuation of sales peak go steadily from April til July, which ended at over 100 millions of Turkish lira. The sales of “IPp” once again witnessed a marginal growth of 100 millions in August but then slowly falling down to that point of July before the company started to make necessary improvement to recover to 170 millions and tend to have moderate rise onwards.

  

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htm Put the essay instructions in the message with your answer. Where is the line graph?

  • htm Put the essay instructions in the message with your answer.
  • Where is the line graph?
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Where is the line graph?

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The line graph shows illustrates“Istanbul Promo plus” sales in a duration (improper usage) of 12 months starting from January of 2007. It is evident that the company saw a considerable fluctuation (improper usage) in the

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