This is my writing ielts part 1. Please help me with it. Thank you so much.

Question

The line graph plots the spending tendencies on books in four different countries from 1995 to 2005.

In general, Germany was the country with the most expense on books among those three countries, which the book spending was stably more than 80 millions dollars.

There was a steady increase in book expenditures at the middle of the 1990s to 1999 in 4 countries. In German, it rose for about 90 million dollars in 1999, then slightly fell down to approximately 83 million dollars in 2003, but it still went up noticeably by 9 million dollars overall. Likewise, Italy had a shortfall in books spending from 55 to 50 million dollars from 1997 to 1999 and remained rising to 62 millions dollars in the final.

Austria and France had upward trends over 20 years. While there was a rapid increase in Austria books spending from 30 at first to 40 in 1999 and unchanged for 2 years until it continued to uplift to 62 millions dollars in 2005, the books expenditure in France increased from 55 to 63 million dollars gradually.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

The line graph plots the ~~spending tendencies on~~ (That is not correct.) amount of money used to purchase books in four different countries(What are the countries?) each year from 1995 to 2005. (Your paragraph is incomplete. You did not name the four countries..)

In general, Germany was the country with the most expenditures ~~expense~~ on books among those ~~three~~ four countries, ~~which the book spending was stably~~ (ungrammatical) at more than 80 millions (wrong form) dollars.

(Your second paragraph is inadequate. You need to give two or three main features, not just one.)

There was a steady increase in book expenditures ~~at the middle of the 1990s~~ (vague. Give the exact year. It is one the graph.) from 1995 to 1999 in 4 all four (Do not use numerals for small numbers that are not data values. Write them in words.) countries. In German, (wrong word) it rose for to about 90 million dollars in 1999, then slightly fell ~~down~~ (It fell. I did not fall down.) to approximately 83 million dollars in 2003, but it still went up ~~noticeably~~ by 9 15 million dollars between the beginning and end of the period. ~~overall~~. Likewise, Italy had a shortfall (wrong word. A shortfall is when you do not have enough money to pay for something.) in books spending from 55 to 50 million dollars from 1997 to 1999 and remained rising to 62 millions (wrong form) dollars in the final. (Final is an adjective. You cannot use it like a noun.)

Austria and France had upward trends over 20 (wrong word and wrong form) years. While there was a ~~rapid~~ increase in Austria's ~~books~~ spending from 30 at first to 40 in 1999 and unchanged for 2 years until it continued to uplift (wrong word) to 62 millions (wrong form) dollars in 2005, the ~~books~~ expenditure in France increased from 55 to 63 million dollars gradually.

You did not do many comparisons. You just described each country separately.

Sample essay (~200 words)

The line graph compares the amounts of money used to buy books each year in Germany, France, Italy, and Austria between 1995 and 2005.

In general, Germany was the country with the largest expenditures compared to the other three during the entire ten-year period. In 1995, Austria spent the least, but it rose to surpass Italy in 2003. Every country showed increased spending, with the highest percentage increase being more than double in Austria.

In 1995 all four countries purchased $215 million dollars worth of books. Germany's share was the highest, at $80 million, and Austria, the least at $30 million. France and Austria spent similar amounts, $55 and $50 million, respectively. This rank order did not change until 2003 when Austria began to outspend Italy, at about $58 million. France was the only country whose outlays never showed a dip; its values went up each year, in total from $55 to $75 million. At the end of the period, in 2005, the amounts for each country were $95 (Austria), $75 (France), $71 (Austria) and $62 million (Italy), for a total of $303 million.

This is my writing ielts part 1. Please help me with it. Thank you so much.

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