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Nawal Posted 23 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
This is my sort essay
hi everybody i have my essay here and i want some of you correct it to me and told me what i have to do more and how to improve my english
In all over the world. family is One of the important things in the people life .but as we all know there are some differences in the way for there custom. Know I well let you know more about similarities and different between past and present family.
There are 2 major similarities for past and present family. The first similarity is in the past family mother taking care of children and does some housework and so in present family. What I mean by that is mother do all the work in the house. For example she is cleaning, cooking and take care for her children. The second similarity both of the family father works out said. What I mean by that is father always work out said to bring money for his family.
On the other hand there are also 2 differences for past and present family. The first difference is in the past family is big but in present family is small. What I mean by that is in the past family include father, mother, children, grandfather, uncle and aunt. But in the present family it is include father, mother and children. The second different is in the past father bring money but in the present family father and mother. What I mean by that is in the past family father works to bring money but new both of them work to bring money to the family.
In conclusion. The 2 similarities which are in past and present family mother job and father job. But in differences the past family is big however the present family is small and father and mother bring money far children. In my opinion the past family is better than present family because it is big.
In all over the world. family is One of the important things in the people life .but as we all know there are some differences in the way for there custom. Know I well let you know more about similarities and different between past and present family.
There are 2 major similarities for past and present family. The first similarity is in the past family mother taking care of children and does some housework and so in present family. What I mean by that is mother do all the work in the house. For example she is cleaning, cooking and take care for her children. The second similarity both of the family father works out said. What I mean by that is father always work out said to bring money for his family.
On the other hand there are also 2 differences for past and present family. The first difference is in the past family is big but in present family is small. What I mean by that is in the past family include father, mother, children, grandfather, uncle and aunt. But in the present family it is include father, mother and children. The second different is in the past father bring money but in the present family father and mother. What I mean by that is in the past family father works to bring money but new both of them work to bring money to the family.
In conclusion. The 2 similarities which are in past and present family mother job and father job. But in differences the past family is big however the present family is small and father and mother bring money far children. In my opinion the past family is better than present family because it is big.
Top answer
Formal writing is more persuasive in acadimic writing. Some corrections that could be made: 1. " Is incomplete sentence,in english you need to make a sentence complete.
- Formal writing is more persuasive in acadimic writing.
- Some corrections that could be made: 1.
- " Is incomplete sentence,in english you need to make a sentence complete.
- so join this sentence by putting a comma.
- In all over the world, family is one of the important things in the people life.
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2 Answers
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Nawal,
It is clear that your essay is informal,firstly because the use of the first pronoun such as 'I', secondly the use of the word in 'my opinion'.That some of the things that distinguish between formal and informal writing.Formal writing is more persuasive in acadimic writing.
Some corrections that could be made:
1. "In all the world." Is incomplete sentence,in en
It is clear that your essay is informal,firstly because the use of the first pronoun such as 'I', secondly the use of the word in 'my opinion'.That some of the things that distinguish between formal and informal writing.Formal writing is more persuasive in acadimic writing.
Some corrections that could be made:
1. "In all the world." Is incomplete sentence,in en
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wow a very nice observation about the life of family before and the present in which we are fully covered by the system of technology.i'm so sorry if my grammar not so good as well. but
I hope you can understand......
I hope you can understand......
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