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Mr. Tom Posted 13 years ago
Grammar
The room was a complete mess....
Hi
Could you please see the following lines and edit them? Any suggestion is welcome.
The room was a complete mess, though nothing was in disarray. The curtains were fraying all over, and the bulbs were lighting through the thick and thin layers of cobwebs, which wouldn’t let an eye miss them in any direction. The formica on the furniture had long come off, and the huge cupboard looked as if made of crocodile skin. The stopped clock on the wall, as old as time itself, testified the eerie stillness of the room.
Thanks,
Tom
Could you please see the following lines and edit them? Any suggestion is welcome.
The room was a complete mess, though nothing was in disarray. The curtains were fraying all over, and the bulbs were lighting through the thick and thin layers of cobwebs, which wouldn’t let an eye miss them in any direction. The formica on the furniture had long come off, and the huge cupboard looked as if made of crocodile skin. The stopped clock on the wall, as old as time itself, testified the eerie stillness of the room.
Thanks,
Tom
Top answer
Not one of your best efforts, Tom. The room was a disaster, though nothing was in disarray. The curtains were frayed and the light shone through thick layers of cobwebs in all directions.
- Not one of your best efforts, Tom.
- The room was a disaster, though nothing was in disarray.
- The curtains were frayed and the light shone through thick layers of cobwebs in all directions.
- The formica had long since come off the furniture, and the huge cupboard looked as if it were made of crocodile hide.
- The stopped clock on the wall, as old as time itself, testified to the eerie stillness of the room.
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3 Answers
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Not one of your best efforts, Tom.
The room was a disaster, though nothing was in disarray. The curtains were frayed and the light shone through thick layers of cobwebs in all directions. The formica had long since come off the furniture, and the huge cupboard looked as if it were made of crocodile hide. The stopped clock on the wall, as old as time itself, testified to the eerie still
The room was a disaster, though nothing was in disarray. The curtains were frayed and the light shone through thick layers of cobwebs in all directions. The formica had long since come off the furniture, and the huge cupboard looked as if it were made of crocodile hide. The stopped clock on the wall, as old as time itself, testified to the eerie still
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Thanks a lot, MM!
Your editing is always a complete lesson.
Could you please shed some light on your use of "since"? Why does it mean here? Also, which one sounds better to you?
The stopped clock on the wall, as old as time itself, testified to the eerie stillness of the room.
or
The stopped clock on the wall, as old as time itself, st
Your editing is always a complete lesson.
Could you please shed some light on your use of "since"? Why does it mean here? Also, which one sounds better to you?
The stopped clock on the wall, as old as time itself, testified to the eerie stillness of the room.
or
The stopped clock on the wall, as old as time itself, st
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Mr. TomCould you please shed some light on your use of "since"?Long since = since long ago.
Mr. Tom which one sounds better to you?The stopped clock on the wall, as old as time itself, testified to the eerie stillness of the room. orThe stopped clock on the wall, as old as time itself, strengthened the stillness of the room.
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