The media should limit how much bad news they report because it discourage people from doing activities which usually involve very little risk. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Question

Nowadays, news tends to have massive and widespread effects on the community. There are a few ideas radio TV and the internet have to reduce the bad news they tell people because they could make them scared to do normal activities.

To begin with, they are no doubt that the media should select appropriate news when they announced it to the public. This is because a lot of news about crimes, and bad events being posted by the media and the media companies often have sensational headlines exaggerating such events to attract audiences from which they can get a lot of profit from people's access to the post. For example, they write too many articles about the bad health effects of working in a phone factory, causing the workers to fall into a state of anxiety and leads to quitting and caused the company heavy loss of property.

However, banning all the bad news reported in the media is unrealistic and unfeasible, if they are no sources of negative information make people lose awareness of bad things that can happen to them. People, therefore, feel overwhelmed and helpless when facing the possibility of bad things happening. For instance, when the covid-19 epidemic hit, the Vietnamese government through the media warned the people and asked them to take measures to avoid the epidemic. Thereby, causing the epidemic in our country controlled stably and safely.

In conclusion, the media plays a vital role in guiding the mass, all news needs publishing to every citizen.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

Please do not put the essay instructions in the "Subject" line.
Put it with your answer in the message body.

Subject: Please review my IELTS essay

Message body:
Topic: Copy the essay instructions accurately here.

My essay:

(Your text here...)
---------------------

AlpheccaStars · Answer

1. You wrote less than 250 words. You lose points for that.

Task: The media should limit how much bad news they report because it discourage (wrong verb form) people from doing activities which usually involve very little risk. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

2. You did not answer the prompt, so you will lose a lot of points for "task response."

The examiner is looking for an answer to this question: To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is good to know a good handful of adverbs of extent because this is a very common prompt in IELTS Task 2 essays. Complete agreement / disagreement:
------------

completely
fully
totally
wholeheartedly
unreservedly
with no reservations
without reservation
unequivocally
unquestionably
with no hesitation
unconditionally

3. Most of your writing was off-topic. It did not address the task instructions.

4. Some of the ideas did not follow logically, so your arguments did not make sense.

5. There were quite a few grammatical errors, particularly wrong verb forms.

~~Nowadays~~, (With a present-tense main verb, "nowadays" is redundant.) The news ~~tends to~~ can have massive and widespread effects on the community. There are a few ideas radio TV and the internet have to reduce the bad news they tell people because they could make them scared to do normal activities. Off-topic. That is not the task. Besides, if the media people had those ideas, why didn't they implement them?

To begin with, they are (wrong words - people are not a doubt.) no doubt that the media should select appropriate news when they announced (wrong tense.) it to the public. This is because a lot of news about crimes, (no comma) and bad events being posted by the media and the media companies often have sensational headlines exaggerating such events to attract audiences from which they can get a lot of profit from people's paid subscriptions. ~~access to the post~~. (Your sentence is too long, complicated, and almost unreadable. It has too many ideas jammed together. It also is not logical from the previous sentence. If scandalous headlines lead to high profits, why should the media not continue this practice? Do companies want to decrease their profits? ) For example, they write too many articles about the bad health effects of working in a phone factory, causing the workers to fall into a state of anxiety and leads (wrong verb form) to the employees quitting and caused (wrong verb form) the company heavy loss of property. (That makes no sense. Property is land and buildings and the contents of buildings. If the employees leave, the property remains.)

However, banning all the bad news reported in the media is unrealistic and unfeasible, (This is off-topic. The task did not ask you about recommendations or solutions. Also, you have a comma splice error. ) if they (wrong word ) are no sources of negative information make (wrong verb form) people lose awareness of bad things that can happen to them. People, therefore, feel overwhelmed and helpless (If people are unaware of the bad things, how can the feel overwhelmed about things they know nothing about? It makes no sense.) when facing the possibility of bad things happening. For instance, when the covid-19 epidemic hit, the Vietnamese government through the media warned the people and asked them to take measures to avoid the epidemic. Thereby, causing the epidemic in our country controlled stably and safely.

(ungrammatical sentence - there is no main verb)

In conclusion, the media plays a vital role in guiding the mass, (comma splice error. You make this mistake a lot.) all news needs publishing to every citizen.

The media should limit how much bad news they report because it discourage people from doing activities which usually involve very little risk. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Top answer

Get the Weekly English Kit 📬

Related Questions