The answer to "Would you mind ~?"

Question

Hello!I read a dialog and could not understand............................................................................A : I love romances. Do you mind if I borrow it?B : Sure. Go ahead. ...........................................................................Is the above right ?I thoght to the question starting "Do (or Would) you mind ~ing?,"  if I don't mind, I can reply 'Of course not,' 'Not at all' ...but  if I do mind somebody do the thing, I can answer 'Yes, I do.' 'Sure.' or else..But, the above looks ok. Is it or not?

BarbaraPA · Accepted Answer

This has been disussed quite a bit lately. The phrasing "do you mind" implies that the person won't mind. So either a yes or no answer is still means "okay, you can have what you asked for." If B didn't want to lend out the book, B would have to say something like "I'm sorry, it's not mine to lend" or "I'm sorry, it's promised to someone else." If B said "Yes, I do mind, actually" it would probably be seen as rude.

(PS - it's spelled thought)

Believer · Answer

Hi GG,

I don't quite understand how the phrasing like this one, "do you mind," could imply that the person won't mind? Who is the "person"? The person who asked the question?

To me, if someone asks this type of question, I would respond like this:

Do you mind if I borrow it?

No, not at all. Go ahead.

Yes, I do. I would rather not lend you that.

Yes, I do agree with you that responding like "Yes, I do mind" gives an air of impoliteness but cannot think of any other responses that would convey the intended meaning.

P/s refer me to other threads, if that will serve me right.

BarbaraPA · Answer

Read through this one: answer to the question"would you mind opening the window?"

I'm not sure how to make this a link. Perhaps a moderator will help me on that. (OK)

Jisu98 · Answer

Thank you for the link. Thanks to it I learned a lot. But, still have a question.

The last post (of the link) says,

I would say "Sure, no problem." Sure is the same as yes or Yeah (Yeah is the slang for yes), so I would say "Yeah, no problem." This way you answer the question (yes/no) and you also make it clear that you are doing it willfully and you do not mind doing it.

'Sure, no problem.' seems a good answer. But, what if just answered 'Sure.' For example,

A: Do you mind my opening the window? ( ->This is a question,also. Is this question a good sentence?)

B: Sure. (Nothing added to 'sure')

In this case, what is the meaning of 'Sure'? Does it mean 'No, I don't mind." or 'Sorry but I'd rather not to." What's your opinion?

BarbaraPA · Answer

Well, like we've already said, either yes or no will mean you're going to do it. It's not a matter of grammar, it's a matter of ettiquette. If you DO mind, you really are expected to apologize for minding.

P.S. - Thanks for making the link.

Clive · Answer

Hi,

The last post (of the link) says, I would say "Sure, no problem." Sure is the same as yes or Yeah (Yeah is the slang for yes), so I would say "Yeah, no problem." This way you answer the question (yes/no) and you also make it clear that you are doing it willfully and you do not mind doing it.

'Sure, no problem.' seems a good answer. But, what if just answered 'Sure.' For example,

A: Do you mind my opening the window? ( ->This is a question,also. Is this question a good sentence?)

B: Sure. (Nothing added to 'sure')

In this case, what is the meaning of 'Sure'? Does it mean 'No, I don't mind." or 'Sorry but I'd rather not to." What's your opinion?

I don't think you should really try to use only strict logic to interpret what this reply means. The normal expectation from such a polite request is that person B will not mind. If person B does in fact object, he will normally make this objection very clear by his tone of voice, and by adding some kind of phrase to bring attention to his objection. eg Yes, I do mind, actually or No, I'd rather you don't.

I would take 'Sure' to mean that I can open the window, unless it is accompanied by a threatening tone of voice or perhaps a leap by the speaker to stand defiantly in front of the window to block my access to it.

You might like to note that person A is speaking more formally, with good grammar. Person B is speaking in a less formal register.

Best wishes, Clive

Anonymous · Answer

Hi Everyone

I agree - yes I do mind sounds terrible to my British ears. We usually give excuses:

Would you mind if I smoke in here?Answer: I'm sorry, it is not allowed.

Would you mind if I opened the window? Answer: I'd rather you didn't because I have a cold.

Would you mind lending me your dictionary? Answer: I'm sorry, I need it myself but you can borrow it later.

Hope this helps

Anonymous · Answer

in the following example sure dosn't mean "yes" it means "no problem"
like when you say to somebody "thanks for letting me in" and she answers like "sure,no worries"

Anonymous · Answer

Thank you for your complete answer.

Razzior · Answer

would you mind if i came to your Horse riding lessons?

The answer to "Would you mind ~?"

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