Teachers please check my task two essay. Thank you very much

Some experts believe that it is better for children to begin learning a foreign language at primary school rather than secondary school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
Learning a second language has become common practice in almost all parts of the world. However, there is still no consensus as to the exact time schoolchildren should acquire a second language. While some believe students must be exposed to a foreign language in secondary school, I, among others, hold that its benefits far outweigh the drawbacks.
It is true that high school students may be more willing to study a new language as they may be more aware of the merits of being a bilingual. However, such language learners are too snowed under with their other studies to handle a new addition. Subjects such as advanced mathematics and chemistry are rather daunting in and of themselves. If a foreign language is introduced into an already steeped schedule, acquisition would not occur to an optimum level, thus wasting part of the efforts made by both the education authorities and students.
In addition, high school students are already into their adolescence and that is far past the "critical age" for optimum language acquisition. Even if they were to dedicate themselves to studying the language, for biological reasons, their brains have lost parts of its plasticity necessary for natural language acquisition. Compared to younger children, they have developed an analytic mind, processing language as a formulaic phenomenon. Even worse, by that time, most children have also developed a language ego, which makes them self-inhibit and not produce enough language output necessary for improving communicative competence.
Elementary students are, on the other hand, fresh and eager to learn. Their minds are not yet filled with facts and figures from years of studying different subjects. They also have a lot of free time to dedicate to learning a new language. In terms of mental capacity, these youngsters absorb any new set of data with ease and do not require much assistance from teachers or guidebooks. There is some concern about whether it is justifiable to expose them to a second language when they are not fully capable of using their own native tongue without flaws; however, this is exactly why they should start at that age. As people become older and their grasp on language becomes firmer, it becomes increasingly more difficult for them not to allow their own understanding of syntax and lexis to interfere with their take on another language.
In a nutshell, language is in fact more of an art than a scientific subject for language learners. Although older children can be more motivated and cognitively competent to learn the ‘usage’ of a language, younger children are at an advantage to acquire natural ‘use’ of a language, which is the principal focus of second language acquisition.