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Persian Learner Posted 7 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing

Task1 IELTS

Hi,

I would appreciate it if you could check the following report.

The bar chart illustrates the urban population distribution in five parts of the world and worldwide in 2003 and the projections of this in 2030.

Overall, there will be an increase in all areas with respect to population of cities, albeit to varying degrees. The global figure is also forecast to see a parallel increment to almost 60 percent in 2030.

According to the data, it was North America that homed the highest city inhabitants in 2003, at 80 percent. Based on estimations, this figure will rise only by a tiny fraction to just above 80% in 2030, putting the area second on the chart. By contrast, the percentage of residents in Africa was around 78% in 2003, climbing just over that of North America in 2030 (82% vs 83%).


According to the chart, the most dramatic change in the urban population is projected to happened in Africa, where the city dwellers will account for more than half of the population in that continent in 2030, a 12% rise in comparison with 2003. Around the same percentage is expected for Asia in 2030, although about 45% of the population there already lived in cities in 2003.


Finally, the urban population in Europe ranked third in 2003 and is predicted to stay the same in 2030. Approximately, seven in ten residents in Europe lived in urban areas in 2003, reaching eight in 2030, according to estimations. The percentage of urban dwellers worldwide are also bound to increase from about 48% in 2003 to just above 60% in 2030.

  

Top answer

and the projections of this in 2030. and projections for 2030. Persian Learner a parallel *increment rise / increase Persian Learner it was North America that *homed the highest city inhabitants housed Persian Learner is projected to *happened to happen Persian Learner The percentage of urban dwellers worldwide are also *bound to increase Expected to 'Is bound to' can mean 'is likely to', but it doesn't work here.

  • and the projections of this in 2030.
  • and projections for 2030.
  • Persian Learner a parallel *increment rise / increase Persian Learner it was North America that *homed the highest city inhabitants housed Persian Learner is projected to *happened to happen Persian Learner The percentage of urban dwellers worldwide are also *bound to increase Expected to 'Is bound to' can mean 'is likely to', but it doesn't work here.
  • All in all, excellent writing.
  • Regards,
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1 Answers
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Some word choice and form things:


Persian Learner

...and the projections of this in 2030.

..and projections for 2030.

Persian Learnera parallel *increment

rise / increase

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