Task 2 IELTS writing - please give me some feedback

Caring for children is probably the most important job in any society. Because of this, all mothers and fathers should be required to take a course that prepares them to be good parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

One of the most pivotal roles of parents is obviously taking care of their children. However, I totally disagree with the idea that people learn about how to become good parents through a mandatory course because it is unnecessary and there would be other more effective ways.

Parents need to face a number of difficulties in their day-to-day lives so it can be burdensome for them to be forced into learning some parenting lessons. To be more precise, both fathers and mothers have to go to work from nine to five almost everyday to earn salaries and cover all costs of living. Therefore, their hectic schedule takes all their time to do other activities. As such, I believe that they can suffer from depression and anxiety if they have to participate in a parenting training course because they will have no time to relieve stress.

Instead of joining lessons which can take a large amount of time, parents can learn to rear their children by other methods, which I believe, are more beneficial. Firstly, they can ask for advice from people who have experience in this field. An example for this would be grandparents because they successfully brought up their own children who are the parents. Another cost-effective solution is looking for useful information from online sources. For example parents can choose a balanced healthy diet for their children if they watch videos on Youtube or read health articles from prestigious websites.

In conclusion, it is certainly vital that parents have responsibility for raising their children in a careful and comprehensive way. Nevertheless, they can be assisted by people who have knowledge in parenting or by useful information on the Internet rather than compulsory parenting courses.