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Vũ Lê Huỳnh Quang Posted 8 years ago
Grammar

Task 1 in the IELTS test

Please help me to check and evaluate this paragraph. Thank you so much.



This line paragraph illustrates the consumption of spreads, including margarine, low fat and reduced spreads and butter. Therein, they use gram unit to describe the figures in over 26 years, from 1981 to 2007.

Generally, the amount of butter and margarine were decreased in the given period. By contrast, the low fat and reduced spreads had a rise. Butter was deemed to be the most popular spread in the initial year. From 1991 to 2001, nevertheless, it was replaced by margarine. In the following years, low fat and reduced spreads were used wisely.

With regards to butter consumption, it got the started figure around 140 grams in the first year, reached a peak at approximately 160 grams after 5 years, then declined dramatically in the rest period. Likewise margarine, began with about 90 grams in consumption, then fluctuated until 1991. It remained steady at 100 grams in the next 5-year before slumping to the bottom point – 40 grams in 2007.

On the flip side, only appeared since 1996, low fat and reduced spreads increased exponentially and touched its peak at over 80 grams in 2001. Afterwards, it slightly decreased to 40 grams in the final.

  

Top answer

I assume this is the average amount consumed per person per day. Without this extra information, the chart does not make much sense. This line paragraph (wrong word) illustrates shows the consumption of spreads, including margarine, low fat and reduced spreads and butter.

  • I assume this is the average amount consumed per person per day.
  • Without this extra information, the chart does not make much sense.
  • This line paragraph (wrong word) illustrates shows the consumption of spreads, including margarine, low fat and reduced spreads and butter.
  • Therein, they use gram unit to describe the figures (incorrect phrasing) in over 26 years, from 1981 to 2007.
  • Generally, the amount of butter and margarine were decreased (wrong form) in the given period.
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1 Answers
0

I assume this is the average amount consumed per person per day. Without this extra information, the chart does not make much sense.


This line paragraph (wrong word) illustrates shows the consumption of spreads, including margarine, low fat and reduced spreads and butter. The

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