Suspect
"OSAKA (TR) – Osaka Prefectural Police believe foreign soccer fans were behind the theft and assault that took place at a convenience store in Chuo Ward on Wednesday night, reports TBS News(Dec. 17).
At 3:00 a.m., three male foreigners dressed in red uniforms allegedly stole cans of beer from an outlet of Family Mart, located in the Dotonbori entertainment district.
Two male employees attempted to stop the suspects but the thieves were then joined by a mob of more than 10 people who proceeded to beat and kick the employees. The group then fled the scene. The employees received minor injuries. ..........."
a) Two male employees attempted to stop the "thieves" but the "suspects" were then joined by a mob ..........................
b) the original sentence
Which one is more proper?
Top answer
I prefer the original. The mob joining them is the beginning of the action, and putting "thieves" there adds clarity and strength to that drama whereas "suspects" is less powerful; so having them reversed results in the clarity/strength being moved to the weaker point of the story. Also in building up the sequence of a story it generally helps to grow step by step from weakness/vagueness into strength/clarity and not the other way round.
- I prefer the original.
- The mob joining them is the beginning of the action, and putting "thieves" there adds clarity and strength to that drama whereas "suspects" is less powerful; so having them reversed results in the clarity/strength being moved to the weaker point of the story.
- Also in building up the sequence of a story it generally helps to grow step by step from weakness/vagueness into strength/clarity and not the other way round.
- Once you've made a strong assertion ("thieves") you don't then weaken it ("suspects").
- The sequence used allows the "allegedly" to be transformed smoothly via "suspects" into a certainty.
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The mob joining them is the beginning of the action, and putting "thieves" there adds clarity and strength to that drama whereas "suspects" is less powerful; so having them reversed results in the clarity/strength being moved to the weaker point of the story.
Also in building up the sequence of a story it generally helps to grow step by step from weakness/vagueness i
0Where I live, the media never refer to a suspect simply as a thief, because guilt is for the courts to decide.
A good defence lawyer would argue that the case should be thrown out by the court on the grounds that his client would be unable to get a fair and
0
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