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Anonymous Posted 11 years ago
Grammar

Structure of this sentence seems off...

Hi!
Structure of this sentence seems off... Can I improve it?

Since the city has a hilly landscape, if you will choose to go around it by taking the ring road, when reaching the highest point, you will have a chance to enjoy an adorable sight over the city.

Thanks Emotion: smile
  

Top answer

I would suggest simplifying it a little. Some possibilities would be as follows. Since the city has a hilly landscape, if you choose to take the ring road and travel around it, you will enjoy an adorable view over the city when you reach the highest point.

— Anonymous

  • I would suggest simplifying it a little.
  • Some possibilities would be as follows.
  • Since the city has a hilly landscape, if you choose to take the ring road and travel around it, you will enjoy an adorable view over the city when you reach the highest point.
  • or Because of its hilly landscape, if you choose to take the ring road and travel around the city, you will enjoy an adorable view when you reach the highest point.
  • You could mix and match these two as you see fit.
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2 Answers
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I would suggest simplifying it a little. Some possibilities would be as follows.

Since the city has a hilly landscape, if you choose to take the ring road and travel around it, you will enjoy an adorable view over the city when you reach the highest point.

or

Because of its hilly landscape, if you choose to take the ring road and travel around the city, you wil
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AnonymousStructure of this sentence seems off... Can I improve it?
'Adorable' is the wrong adjective; it means 'cute, lovable' and is used of babies and puppies. It can use considerable other improvement:

Since the city is hilly, you can take the ring road to the highest point and enjoy an attractive panorama of it.
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