SOP Review- Please Help !

Hello Fellow Member's,

Myself Ashesh,I am applying for Masters Degree in Business Intelligence Domain at University of Brusells,The application formality requires me to Update an Motivation Letter ( Cover Letter) stating my reason and interest in this particular field of study.This program is under Erasmuns Mundus ( A highly competitive Scholarship programme).

Apart from having good academics,a well written SOP is equally importent for being selected in such programmes.
Please let me know your valuble suggestions

SOP

"The person who makes a success of living is the one who sees his goal steadily and aims for it unswervingly”. Goal oriented is how I would describe myself. A passion to achieve expertise in Business Intelligence (BI) has become a huge industrial domain and a major economic driver. There was never been a better time to pursue career in Business Intelligence than present. It’s no longer enough to present a technological solution when there is a problem, a successful IT professional should pitch solutions, before stakeholders even knows there is a need.

Having an experience of 2 years in the field of Information Technology has taught me that, deep knowledge of both technology and application area is crucial for the success of intelligent applications. This very need inspires me to pursue my career in the field of Business Intelligence. If ever there was a career that fits into the need to mesh technology and business success, it is Business Intelligence. I believe joining Erasmus Mundus Joint Master’s in Information Technologies for Business Intelligence –IT4BI would be ideal way to kick start my journey of becoming a successful Business Consultant.

I have completed Post Graduate Diploma in System Analyst from National University of Singapore, 2011, Scored - 3.58/5 also completed Bachelors in Computer Engineering from Bharath University, India 2009, Scored - 8.54/10 (First class with Distinction). In the pursuit of knowledge, I have always adopted a rigorous approach in order to attain an in-depth understanding of the subject at hand. This is amply reflected in my consistent academic career, always coming in with the top students in my class. Currently am working with Global Foundries, An industry leader in Foundry Business as a Software Developer, Since Jan 2011 and also worked with Silicon Labs as a Software Developer (Intern).

I would like to mention that during my Internship I had an opportunity to work on Business Intelligence related project for the very first time; I was very amazed by knowing the fact that the business report we created helped organization to increase its profit margin by approximately 5-6% by forecasting a very near to perfect Supply-Demand variation chart. This much known fact had always fascinated me to explore more in this field; as a result I was an active contributor in SAP UNIVERSITY educational forum. My other areas of interest are Factory automation, Analytical Programming and project management. I have learned Business Intelligence- Web Intelligence, Crystal Reports, Languages Known- C, C#, Java, J2SE, Visual Basic, UNIX, and ASP.NET, SQL SERVER 2005, ORACLE, My SQL.

Being an enthusiastic student who likes to take up challenges, the Erasmus Mundus master’s program is an optimum course as it will equip me with the right skill sets to step into the exciting domain of Business Intelligence. I am sure that exposure to these kinds of diverse influences would aid in the overall development of my personality. I believe that I have the qualities to be a good researcher. I am a creative person and often think in a contemplative way about various issues of practical importance. Being able to identify patterns and relationships that are not obvious to others is perhaps my greatest strength. This will prove very valuable because an integral part of being a researcher is to perceive the balance between theory and practice, analytical rigor and intuition. I enjoy talking to people which is one of the reasons I’m so active in the community forums. Business Intelligence lends itself to more interaction because you are developing your projects for users. - An ideal platform for the dissemination of knowledge in my chosen field of specialization. My long-term goal is to put my footprints in the field of System Designing through contribution of original ideas and translating those ideas to develop high end applications and products.Besides academics and work, I love to interact with people, trying new cuisines, watching animation movies. I like to explore cultures, ideologies and rituals which will be another important aspect during the Erasmus program

Obtaining admission to this program, jointly offered by Université Libre de Bruxelles and, Ecole Centrale Paris (where I plan to pursue my second year of studies) both leading academic institutions with a global repute for research will provide me with the perfect opportunity to convert my passion into profession. Interacting with students and professors from your university and other universities, I am confident of my decision of pursuing IT4BI would strongly influence my career. With many distinguished scientists as professors, I know that I will gain expert knowledge at the forefront of discovery. It will provide me with the incentive, experience and proficiency to develop myself into a successful proponent of a subject which has abundant potential.

Given my past history of commitment to excellence, I am confident that I will bring a high level of energy and enthusiasm to your program. I will enrich the program by enabling fellow students and professors to benefit from my ambitious and open nature. Furthermore, my international background and vast working experience will add more diversity to your program. I would be looking forward to be part of the program and enrich my knowledge in the field of BI