Some words from a video

There are several words and parts of this video that I just can't figure out,

I'll leave the parts blank and underlined while showing you the most complete fragments and sentences where the confusing parts are located.

1. From 0:57, "Here's a piece of ____, smell it close, you'll like it more, yeah!"

2. From 1:03, "That is exactly the dumbiest ____ I got from this Puerto Rican personal trainer."

3. From 1:20, "____-looking ass fool, how about I beat you _________ back to Puerto Rico?", and then the following

sentence "Why the hell do these vampires ___ in the sunlight?" Is it "litter"? Which in other words, "multiply"? Because the next thing he said shortly after was "So you're telling me that instead of bursting into flames, when they hit the sun, they turn into a gay disco bar?"

4.From 1:33, I have no idea what he was saying until " drinking all holy water known to church". And why did he say something like that? I don't understand the logic here, either!