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Zhossain Posted 12 years ago
Grammar
Snow , Ice and Cold
Hello ,
someone, please help me with the below paragraphs. I am not quite sure, if it's grammatically correct or not. I would really appreciate it, if someone can make some time to look into it.. Thanks.
'Earlier this year I had developed an irresistible urge to go to the Himalayas again, although it had been only 4 or 5 months since I left that place.But I guess, when every single cell of your body tells you to do something , you cant ignore the urge to listen.
So, finally when it was time for me to set off for the trek of my lifetime, It was not only joy or excitement i felt , rather something extraordinary.
On 25th of April,2014 I found myself standing on the mass of moraine and ice surrounded by glaciers and the stark beauty of some of the worlds tallest and most dramatic peaks.I certainly experienced nothing, but complete astonishment. I looked around and felt so blessed.I was filed with awe standing before the highest structure of the world.
Its the ground where so many had come before.At 17000 feet high above the sea level everything looks so unearthly, so unreal. Its quite impossible to express feelings you experienced throughout the trek to get there.Every bend in the trail brings a spectacular view and a fresh experience.
You may jump off an airplane , go base jumping , swim with the sharks, or even go out to sail in outer space, to experience blood racing through your veins , but this is an experience unlike any other.
Its not only Mt Everest that makes the region so special, when you trek over 4000m it becomes so apparent to you."
someone, please help me with the below paragraphs. I am not quite sure, if it's grammatically correct or not. I would really appreciate it, if someone can make some time to look into it.. Thanks.
'Earlier this year I had developed an irresistible urge to go to the Himalayas again, although it had been only 4 or 5 months since I left that place.But I guess, when every single cell of your body tells you to do something , you cant ignore the urge to listen.
So, finally when it was time for me to set off for the trek of my lifetime, It was not only joy or excitement i felt , rather something extraordinary.
On 25th of April,2014 I found myself standing on the mass of moraine and ice surrounded by glaciers and the stark beauty of some of the worlds tallest and most dramatic peaks.I certainly experienced nothing, but complete astonishment. I looked around and felt so blessed.I was filed with awe standing before the highest structure of the world.
Its the ground where so many had come before.At 17000 feet high above the sea level everything looks so unearthly, so unreal. Its quite impossible to express feelings you experienced throughout the trek to get there.Every bend in the trail brings a spectacular view and a fresh experience.
You may jump off an airplane , go base jumping , swim with the sharks, or even go out to sail in outer space, to experience blood racing through your veins , but this is an experience unlike any other.
Its not only Mt Everest that makes the region so special, when you trek over 4000m it becomes so apparent to you."
Top answer
I highlighted some errors, and bold-faced a few suggestions. B ut I guess , when every single cell of your body tells you to do something , you cant ignore the urge to listen. So, finally when it was time for me to set off for the trek of my lifetime, I t was not only joy or excitement i felt , rather something extraordinary.
- I highlighted some errors, and bold-faced a few suggestions.
- B ut I guess , when every single cell of your body tells you to do something , you cant ignore the urge to listen.
- So, finally when it was time for me to set off for the trek of my lifetime, I t was not only joy or excitement i felt , rather something extraordinary.
- On the 25th of Apri l,2 014 , I found myself standing on the mass of moraine (?
- a moraine is a sculpted land feature.
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6 Answers
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I highlighted some errors, and bold-faced a few suggestions.
'Earlier this year I had developed an irresistible urge to go to the Himalayas again, although it had been only 4 or 5 months since I left that place.But I guess, when every single cell of your body tells you to do something , you
'Earlier this year I had developed an irresistible urge to go to the Himalayas again, although it had been only 4 or 5 months since I left that place.But I guess, when every single cell of your body tells you to do something , you
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Dear AlpheccaStars,
Thank you so much for your time. If you do not mind I would like to discuss some of the errors that you have pointed.
Like ' since I left that place.But I guess, - here B should be smaller. Is that the case?
the next one : lifetime, It was - is comma unnecessary here?
'.I certainly experienced nothing, ' what's the problem here?
Thank you so much for your time. If you do not mind I would like to discuss some of the errors that you have pointed.
Like ' since I left that place.But I guess, - here B should be smaller. Is that the case?
the next one : lifetime, It was - is comma unnecessary here?
'.I certainly experienced nothing, ' what's the problem here?
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zhossainLike ' since I left that place.But I guess, - here B should be smaller. Is that the case?You need a space after a full stop.
zhossainthe next one : lifetime, It was - is comma unnecessary here?"it" is not a proper noun, nor is it the first word in the sentence. The capitalization is an error.
zho
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Thanks for your insight, it was very helpful. 
I need to ask you one last question. Subject that I used here ' snow, cold
I need to ask you one last question. Subject that I used here ' snow, cold
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zhossain ' snow, cold and ice' can it be used as the title for the paragraph?Yes, but is that what the paragraph is about?
Something like "Trekking to the Sky" is more descriptive.
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No, it is not. I picked it because it was the coldest three weeks of my life where the temperature was always below 5 degree during the day.After dark it dropped to minus fifteen at times.
Anyway, "trekking to the sky " is a nice title, but I think it's too obvious. How about "Through the land of ice and snow"
Thanks again.
Anyway, "trekking to the sky " is a nice title, but I think it's too obvious. How about "Through the land of ice and snow"
Thanks again.
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