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Julielai Posted 20 years ago
Jokes, Puzzles & Riddles
Silly humour for the Week
One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "My dear child, why are you crying?"
The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their family.
The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with pearls. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked. The seamstress replied, "No."
The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out a silver thimble ringed with sapphires. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked. Again, the seamstress replied, "No."
The Lord reached down again and came up with a leather thimble "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked. The seamstress replied, "Yes."
The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy.
Some years later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the riverbank, and her husband fell into the river and disappeared under the water.
When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked her, "Why are you crying?"
"Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the river!"
The Lord went down into the water and came up with George Clooney. "Is this your husband?" the Lord asked. "Yes," cried the seamstress.
The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"
The seamstress replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to George Clooney, you would have come up with Brad Pitt. Then if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I'm not in the best of health and would not be able to take care of all three husbands, so THAT'S why I said 'yes' to George Clooney."
And so the Lord let her keep him.
The moral of this story is: Whenever a woman lies, it's for a good and honorable reason, and in the best interest of others. That's our story, and we're sticking to it.
Signed, by Women
The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their family.
The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with pearls. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked. The seamstress replied, "No."
The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out a silver thimble ringed with sapphires. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked. Again, the seamstress replied, "No."
The Lord reached down again and came up with a leather thimble "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked. The seamstress replied, "Yes."
The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy.
Some years later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the riverbank, and her husband fell into the river and disappeared under the water.
When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked her, "Why are you crying?"
"Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the river!"
The Lord went down into the water and came up with George Clooney. "Is this your husband?" the Lord asked. "Yes," cried the seamstress.
The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"
The seamstress replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to George Clooney, you would have come up with Brad Pitt. Then if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I'm not in the best of health and would not be able to take care of all three husbands, so THAT'S why I said 'yes' to George Clooney."
And so the Lord let her keep him.
The moral of this story is: Whenever a woman lies, it's for a good and honorable reason, and in the best interest of others. That's our story, and we're sticking to it.
Signed, by Women
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13 Answers
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Hmmmm...........anyone considering becoming seamstress (who knows what the good Lord may visit and bestow)?? 
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> Then if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I'm not in the best of health and would not be able to take care of all three husbands, so THAT'S why I said 'yes' to George Clooney."
Not that logical. If the woman was unable to take care of all three of them, she could say "No, thanks, I only w
Not that logical. If the woman was unable to take care of all three of them, she could say "No, thanks, I only w
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I am really getting vexed with this. All these seamstresses dropping thimbles and husbands and the good Lord always gives me away as a cheap giveaway. I am sure, once they get bored with me, they will push me into the river and wait for Brad.
- George Clooney
- George Clooney
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> I am really getting vexed with this. All these seamstresses dropping thimbles and husbands and the good Lord always gives me away as a cheap giveaway. I am sure, once they get bored with me, they will push me into the river and wait for Brad.
> - George Clooney
Hi FluidnMotion ,
It sounds like you are the George Clooney, doesn't it? :-s
> - George Clooney
Hi FluidnMotion ,
It sounds like you are the George Clooney, doesn't it? :-s
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seamstress drops her husband in the river & prays
"Dear Lord, have mercy!
I've always loved my husband,
Although he was puny,
I pray do not replace him with George Clooney,
It's just that George seems completely unfit,
I think I could do with someone like Brad Pitt!"
"Dear Lord, have mercy!
I've always loved my husband,
Although he was puny,
I pray do not replace him with George Clooney,
It's just that George seems completely unfit,
I think I could do with someone like Brad Pitt!"
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All ye eves! why do thee savour a pit(t)?
Could be a cruise or a gear or even a twit.
And don't you have to fight Mrs.Smith;
Worth the trouble, for a man to be with?
Could be a cruise or a gear or even a twit.
And don't you have to fight Mrs.Smith;
Worth the trouble, for a man to be with?
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Benitaseamstress drops her husband in the river & prays
"Dear Lord, have mercy!
I've always loved my husband,
Although he was puny,
I pray do not replace him with George Clooney,
It's just that George seems completely unfit,
I think I could do with someone like Brad Pitt!"
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