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Perfect Stranger Posted 13 years ago
Essay & Composition Writing
(short) paragraph no. 2 - can you correct my corrections?
Dear All,
Here's a short paragrahp that I've been trying to correct. Can you point out to my mistakes? I'd be grateful if you could tell me which parts are utterly wrong and then I could try my best to rewrite them. I know you guys are busy so I'll first try to make it better myself and if I fail, I'll ask for your further assistance. Thanks!
ORIGINAL: XYZ is a large-scale enterprise with general contracting of building engineering construction and engages in following professions such as municipal works, steel structure, earth and stone works, building decorations, concrete prefabricated members, groundwork and foundation, building curtain wall, export of labor force, leasing of machinery, test and detection, beam manufacture etc. it was founded in 1962, up to now it has 16 subsidiaries that are located in 18 regions.
CORRECTED BY ME: XYZ was founded in 1962 and up till now the Group has 16 subsidiaries under its wings, located in 18 different regions. It is a large-scale enterprise engaged in a broad-scope of civil engineering works, such as: municipal works, steel structure construction, earth and stone works, building decoration, erection of concrete prefabricated members, execution of groundwork and foundation preparation as well as construction of building curtain walls. Moreover, we deal with leasing of machinery, test and detection, labor force export and beam manufacture.
Here's a short paragrahp that I've been trying to correct. Can you point out to my mistakes? I'd be grateful if you could tell me which parts are utterly wrong and then I could try my best to rewrite them. I know you guys are busy so I'll first try to make it better myself and if I fail, I'll ask for your further assistance. Thanks!
ORIGINAL: XYZ is a large-scale enterprise with general contracting of building engineering construction and engages in following professions such as municipal works, steel structure, earth and stone works, building decorations, concrete prefabricated members, groundwork and foundation, building curtain wall, export of labor force, leasing of machinery, test and detection, beam manufacture etc. it was founded in 1962, up to now it has 16 subsidiaries that are located in 18 regions.
CORRECTED BY ME: XYZ was founded in 1962 and up till now the Group has 16 subsidiaries under its wings, located in 18 different regions. It is a large-scale enterprise engaged in a broad-scope of civil engineering works, such as: municipal works, steel structure construction, earth and stone works, building decoration, erection of concrete prefabricated members, execution of groundwork and foundation preparation as well as construction of building curtain walls. Moreover, we deal with leasing of machinery, test and detection, labor force export and beam manufacture.
Top answer
XYZ was founded in 1962 and currently the group has 16 subsidiaries located in 18 different regions. It is a large-scale enterprise engaged in a broad-scope of civil engineering projecst, such as municipal works, steel structure construction, earth and stone works, building decoration, erection of concrete prefabricated structures, execution of groundwork, and foundation preparation as well as the construction of building curtain walls. Moreover, we deal with leasing of machinery, testing and detection, labor force export and beam manufacturing.
- XYZ was founded in 1962 and currently the group has 16 subsidiaries located in 18 different regions.
- It is a large-scale enterprise engaged in a broad-scope of civil engineering projecst, such as municipal works, steel structure construction, earth and stone works, building decoration, erection of concrete prefabricated structures, execution of groundwork, and foundation preparation as well as the construction of building curtain walls.
- Moreover, we deal with leasing of machinery, testing and detection, labor force export and beam manufacturing.
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2 Answers
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XYZ was founded in 1962 and currently the group has 16 subsidiaries located in 18 different regions. It is a large-scale enterprise engaged in a broad-scope of civil engineering projecst, such as municipal works, steel structure construction, earth and stone works, building decoration, erection of concrete prefabricated structures, execution of groundwork, and foundation preparation as well as the
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The XYZ Group was founded in 1962 and currently has 16 subsidiaries located in 18 different regions. Do you mean 'countries', or regions of some specific country?
It is a large-scale enterprise engaged in a broad scope of civil engineering projec
It is a large-scale enterprise engaged in a broad scope of civil engineering projec
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