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Marold Posted 13 years ago
Grammar

Short letter - correction of mistakes, please

Dear Mr Roberts,

I am writing this letter to you with a view to commenting on the changes to the club that have been proposed by the management as well as to put forward some additional proposals that I came up with.
First of all, having a second sauna sounds quite inviting to me; nevertheless, there are more pressing things to bear in mind, as a result of which we should draw our attention rather to taking on a number of qualified instructors who would be well up to undertaking a wider variety of jobs we could subsequently offer to our customers.
As far as additional equipment goes, I do not consider it essential since I am afraid there will be a distinct lack of space in the Gym and furthermore, from my point of view, our gym is sufficiently equipped and meets the fundamental needs. Instead of that, I would float the idea of extending the area where the changings rooms are situated, which would make it more convenient for the customers and moreover, queues would be prevented for good.
Finally, the unsatisfactory condition of the snack bar can be put down to the shortage of cooking facilities such as microwaves. Sorting this problem out may positively lead to an increase in profits because people would tend to buy more due to the wider range of dishes. The acquisition of a wide screen television, alluring though it might seem, is an issue I beg you to reassess more carefully since I find it beyond the bounds of possibility that we could afford to purchase it.
I sincerely hope you will give these alternative proposals some consideration and maybe, they will come in handy while you will be making up your mind I look forward to your feedback..

Yours sincerely,

Marek Doležal.
  
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