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Anonymous Posted 10 years ago
Grammar
Sentence structure?
Is this sentence grammatically correct?
Three young landfill workers, Petey, Ray, and James are men with big dreams, who amidst sorting out trash, discover a jewelry box. Shocked, they believe it is their lucky day and the box will be able to realize their dream as influential people. Unbeknownst to the trio, the box brings them an unexpected, yet hilarious adventure with Koi's most-frightened and most-influential mafias - King and Kong, who have apparently lost the box during an illegal business transaction
Three young landfill workers, Petey, Ray, and James are men with big dreams, who amidst sorting out trash, discover a jewelry box. Shocked, they believe it is their lucky day and the box will be able to realize their dream as influential people. Unbeknownst to the trio, the box brings them an unexpected, yet hilarious adventure with Koi's most-frightened and most-influential mafias - King and Kong, who have apparently lost the box during an illegal business transaction
Top answer
I would tidy it up a bit to make it clearer and more grammatical: Three young landfill workers- Petey, Ray, and Jame -are men with big dreams, who, while sorting out trash, discover a jewelry box. Shocked, they believe it is their lucky day and that the box will help them to realize their dreams of becoming influential people. Unbeknownst to the trio, the box will bring them an unexpected, yet hilarious adventure involving Koi's most-frightening and most-influential mafias- King and Kong -who apparently lost the box during an illegal business transaction
- I would tidy it up a bit to make it clearer and more grammatical: Three young landfill workers- Petey, Ray, and Jame -are men with big dreams, who, while sorting out trash, discover a jewelry box.
- Shocked, they believe it is their lucky day and that the box will help them to realize their dreams of becoming influential people.
- Unbeknownst to the trio, the box will bring them an unexpected, yet hilarious adventure involving Koi's most-frightening and most-influential mafias- King and Kong -who apparently lost the box during an illegal business transaction
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2 Answers
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I would tidy it up a bit to make it clearer and more grammatical:
Three young landfill workers-Petey, Ray, and Jame-are men with big dreams, who, while sorting out trash, discover a jewelry box. Shocked, they believe it is their lucky day and that the box will help them to realize their dreams of becoming influential people. Unbeknownst to the trio, the box will bring them an u
Three young landfill workers-
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The system is creating cross-outs where I meant to put dashes, so I will re-do:
Three young landfill workers -- Petey, Ray, and James -- are men with big dreams, who, while sorting out trash, discover a jewelry box. Shocked, they believe it is their lucky day and that the box will help them to realize their dreams of becoming influential people. Unbeknownst to the trio, the box will bring
Three young landfill workers -- Petey, Ray, and James -- are men with big dreams, who, while sorting out trash, discover a jewelry box. Shocked, they believe it is their lucky day and that the box will help them to realize their dreams of becoming influential people. Unbeknownst to the trio, the box will bring
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