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TinaMr Posted 12 years ago
Grammar

Sentence structure

Hello everybody,
I don't like how this sentence sounds (mainly the second part) but I can't understand why exactly:
Actually, most of them were out of the city (including you) but even those ones who were there, I didn't have time to see them.
Thank you in advance!
  

Top answer

Say eg Actually, most of them were out of the city, including you, but I didn't have time to see even the ones who were not .

— Clive

  • Say eg Actually, most of them were out of the city, including you, but I didn't have time to see even the ones who were not .
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5 Answers
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Say
eg Actually, most of them were out of the city, including you, but I didn't have time to see even the ones who were not.
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Hi

For me, the word that sticks out is 'ones'. I don't think it is needed (.. 'even those who were there' ..)

Apart from that, I liked your sentence. It is cast in a way that slightly emphasises the fact that you didn't have time to see the people and that is the point of the sentence. 'See them' falls naturally at the end - the grammar is fine

If you wanted to change
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Clive, thank you! Now it looks like a well-structured phrase! Thank you, again!
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Clive has left 'ones' in, so I have to think. Yes, 'ones' will work well if it refers back to a noun, say like this:

- I made so many new friends in Budapest last year. Many were not there now and I didn't have time to visit even the ones who were

Dave
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Thank you, Dave! To be honest, at first, I deleted "ones", but as I was confused and didn't know what exactly to change in this sentence, I put it back. Now I can see it! Thank you!
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