second half of motivation letter, plz help me regarding style and language accuracy

Question

I have studied Europe over last couple of years and met diverse nationals from different parts of Europe. I born grew up and also studied in Asia. I studied in different places as an exchange and for summer school and many of my course mates; dorm mates are from Europe, Africa, different part of Asia like South East Asia, East Asia where I embraced multiculturalism and diversity. My openness and multicultural background could be effective weapon for me to understand the context of research area (/location) since it is apparent that this project might go beyond the national boundary and will focus on devising the way to deal trans boundary problem. As an aside, I am taking the opportunity to say that I am very adaptive to different environment, different cultures, economic practice which is crucial for the applied position.

Noticeably, governments and the private sector realize PPPs as an effective way of providing important public service infrastructure. This research will provide valuable input regarding hybrid form of governance in volatile transitional context but also will provide guidance to bring innovation in governance in order to join up efficiently public private resources in the delivery of public services. I am personally so fascinated by various social problems and challenge the world facing in different ways. Public Administration study enhances my analytical ability and provides comprehensive training in methodology that ignites my interest in doing something that match with my interest as well as have the scope for innovation.

As already mentioned, I have public administration as my academic background (did my bachelor, master and MPhil all from Public Administration) which is more of public sector or public organization oriented, conducted thesis (60 credits) on NGOs and have prior working experiences in private organization. So, apparently, I have some sorts of connection and acquaintance with all three actors (government entity, NGOs, private organizations), either academically or professionally; and this might give me additional advantages while I will be dealing with public and private organization in scrutinizing the synergies between them.
I am currently residing in city A,and I am totally available for the position. I can join instantly in the position. I believe that if I am given a chance to be a part of this project I can surely serve my cerebration to a greater expansion in governance issues in more innovative way and inquire the dynamics between public and private, to discern the potential areas of future synergies between them.

AlpheccaStars · Accepted Answer

Here are some comments on the first paragraph. I suggest that you make a list or outline of the points you want to make, and then carefully write those points out.

I have studied Europe (what subject? - eg European history, politics, geography?) over last couple of years and met ~~diverse nationals~~ people from different parts of Europe. I was born, grew up and also studied in Asia. I studied in different places as an exchange student. In ~~and for~~ summer school ~~and~~ many of my fellow students ~~course mates~~; dorm mates are (are you in summer school now?) from Europe, Africa, different parts of Asia like South East Asia, East Asia where I embraced multiculturalism and diversity. (I don't understand this sentence. Is your summer school in East Asia? Why do you use past tense - embraced - when the main sentence is present? ) My openness and multicultural background could be an effective weapon (weapons are not good things. ) for me to understand the context of the research area (/location) since it is apparent that this project might go beyond the national boundary and will focus on devising the way to deal (with?) trans boundary problems (I don't understand "trans boundary." I also don't understand if the project MIGHT cross a national boundary, why its focus is based on assumption that it definitely will.). As an aside, I am taking the opportunity to say that I am very adaptive to different environments, different cultures, economic practices which is crucial for the ~~applied~~ position I applied for.

Mizanur · Answer

I am rewriting the whole things again. The next two para is the third and fourth part of my essay. I would be grateful if you go through it:

Aside my education, I have two years experiences in different positions including both national and multinational corporations. I worked as a customer manager at Contact Centre division at Grameenphone Ltd. (in Bangladesh). Since Grameenphone is a venture of renowned Telenor Group, various countries’ citizens are working there and it nurtures a wonderful corporate practice that helps me to internalize standard corporate culture and ignite my professionalism. This experience also played an important role to enhance my communication ability and increase outstanding relationship building and networking skills. I received various training on communication as I had to communicate with customers of grameenphone in both Bengali and English language on regular basis.

After grameenphone, I worked for a group of company, named DIRD Group, as a management trainee and later on assigned in their Commercial Department. During my period at DIRD, I came to know various issues in connection to international trade, commercial documentation, other documentation, letter of credit (L/C). Moreover, I received training on Uniform Customs and Practice for Documentary Credits (UCPDC 600) and International Standard Banking Practice (ISBP) to increase my efficiency in handling commercial documents within legal framework. Along with the preparing commercial documents, I had to maintain a regular communication to freight forwarding & supply chain management service providers and carrying and forwarding agencies (C&F) in order to ensure timely delivery of goods. I also worked as an apprentice reporter in a national English daily newspaper for few months. I have gained many transferable skills from my varied job experiences. I suppose the experience of seeing closely an organization’s activities as an insider may help me to understand the governance of GVCs (Global Value Chains)

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AlpheccaStars · Answer

It is hard for me to make comments since I injured one hand and have to use my computer one-handed.

Aside from my education, I have two years' experience (experience is a non-count noun) in different positions including both national and multinational corporations. I worked as a customer manager at Contact Centre division at Grameenphone Ltd. in Bangladesh. Since Grameenphone is a venture of renowned Telenor Group, various countries’ citizens are working there. It nurtures a wonderful corporate practice that helps me to internalize (learn, become accustomed to) standard corporate culture and ignite ?? my professionalism. This experience also played an important role to enhance my communication abilities and increase (develop) outstanding relationship-building and networking skills. I received various training classes on communication as I had to communicate with customers of grameenphone in both Bengali and English ~~language~~ on a regular basis.

After grameenphone, I worked for a group of company, named the DIRD Group, as a management trainee and later on was assigned in their Commercial Department. During my period at DIRD, I came to know various issues in connection to with international trade, commercial documentation, other documentation (vague), and letters of credit (L/C). Moreover, I received training on Uniform Customs and Practice for Documentary Credits (UCPDC 600) and International Standard Banking Practice (ISBP) to increase my efficiency in handling commercial documents within the legal framework. Along with ~~the~~ preparing commercial documents, I had to maintain a regular communication to with forwarding & supply chain management service providers and carrying and forwarding agencies (C&F) in order to ensure timely delivery of goods. I also worked as an apprentice reporter in a national English daily newspaper for few months. I gained many transferable skills from my varied job experiences. I suppose the experience of seeing closely an organization’s activities as an insider may help me to understand the governance of GVCs (Global Value Chains)

Mizanur · Answer

Dear AlpheccaStars , I do appreciate your effort. Single hand typing is quite impossible for me. Thanks a lot. I ask more favour from you. I have written a motivation letter for a MS programme. I understand your present situation, so I only presenting few sentences about which I have confusion in terms grammatical accuracy. I will be thankful if you manage time to look over these sentences:

""""""''''''''''''''''''''''
1. I would like to apply for MPP programme at Graduate School of Public Policy in University of R campus for fall 2015.
The curriculum offered by MPP is another factor that motivates me for this programme.

2. In these organizations, I got opportunities to have practical exposure on financial and commercial matters, and that knowledge might be helpful for MPP programme.

3. As a part of my job I had to interact with public sector like Bangladesh customs authority, VAT and board of revenue etc. While I was dealing with public sector, I realized the necessity of ensuring governance for the development of a country.
After couple of years’ experience, I came to Europe to pursue my Master’s in Public Administration in continuation of my bachelor study.

4. I contacted faculty (or professor) of graduate school whose areas of research interest have a good match to my research interest and prior background. I got positive response from both cases, and I feel privileged that Professor Daniel agreed explicitly to supervise me once I enrolled in the programme.
I believe, my public administration background which is more of government sector oriented and working experience in private sector includes both national and large multinational organization creates a wonderful combination of knowledge and experiences that makes me a suitable candidate for MPP programme and as well as for third sector.

5. I would like to make contribution, as a part of civil society (since I want to work with NGO/INGOs/Intergovernmental organizations), by providing effecting input to policy making in order to promote good governance.
''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''""""""

Thank you again and I hope you will get over soon.

Mizanur · Answer

@Alphecca Stars

AlpheccaStars · Answer

1. I would like to apply for the MPP programme at the Graduate School of Public Policy in University of R campus for fall 2015.
The curriculum offered by MPP is another factor that motivates me ~~for~~ to enroll in this programme.

2. In these organizations, I had ~~got~~ opportunities for ~~to have~~ practical exposure to on financial and commercial subjects ~~matters~~, and that knowledge might be helpful for the MPP programme.

3. As a part of my job I had to interact with public sectors like the Bangladesh customs authority, VAT and board of revenue etc. While I was dealing with the public sector, I realized the necessity of ensuring governance for the development of a country.
After a couple of years’ experience, I came to Europe to pursue my Master’s in Public Administration in continuation of my bachelor's study.

4. I have contacted faculty (or professors) of graduate schools whose areas of research ~~interest~~ have a good match to my research interest and prior background. I ~~got~~ received positive response from two schools ~~both~~ ~~cases~~, and I feel privileged that Professor Daniel agreed explicitly to supervise me once I enrolled in the programme.
I believe that my public administration background, which is more of in the government sector ~~oriented~~, and my working experience in the private sector including both national and large multinational organizations creates a wonderful combination of knowledge and experiences that makes me a suitable candidate for the MPP programme and as well as for third sector (???what is third sector?).

5. I would like to make a contribution as a part of civil society (since I want to work with NGO/INGOs/Intergovernmental organizations), by providing effecting input to policy-making in order to promote good governance.

Mizanur · Answer

thanks a bunch. I can't express my thankfulness

Third sector: voluntary sector or non-profit sector is often recognized by some scholars as third sector. I already used the term before (before that sentence) with proper clarification. So the jargon was the continuation of previous discussion.

second half of motivation letter, plz help me regarding style and language accuracy

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