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StevanHogg Posted 22 years ago
Jokes, Puzzles & Riddles
Scottish Jokes
WEE HUGHIE AND THE GROWLER
Wee Hughie is sitting on a train across from a
busty blonde wearing a tiny mini skirt.
Despite his efforts, he is unable to stop staring at the top of her thighs. To his delight, he realises she has gone without underwear.
The blonde realises he is staring and
inquires, "Are you looking at my growler?"
"Yes, I'm sorry," says Wee Hughie and promises to avert his eyes.
"It's quite alright," replies the woman, "It's very talented, watch this, I'll make it blow a kiss to you."
Sure enough the growler blows him a kiss.
Wee Hughie, who is completely absorbed, inquires what else the growler can do.
"I can also make it wink," says the woman. Wee Hughie stares in amazement as the growler winks at him.
"Come and sit next to me," suggests the woman, patting the seat. Wee Hughie moves over
and is asked, "Would you like to stick a couple of fingers in?"
Stunned, Wee Hughie replies, "Good grief! Can it whistle, too?"
Wee Hughie is sitting on a train across from a
busty blonde wearing a tiny mini skirt.
Despite his efforts, he is unable to stop staring at the top of her thighs. To his delight, he realises she has gone without underwear.
The blonde realises he is staring and
inquires, "Are you looking at my growler?"
"Yes, I'm sorry," says Wee Hughie and promises to avert his eyes.
"It's quite alright," replies the woman, "It's very talented, watch this, I'll make it blow a kiss to you."
Sure enough the growler blows him a kiss.
Wee Hughie, who is completely absorbed, inquires what else the growler can do.
"I can also make it wink," says the woman. Wee Hughie stares in amazement as the growler winks at him.
"Come and sit next to me," suggests the woman, patting the seat. Wee Hughie moves over
and is asked, "Would you like to stick a couple of fingers in?"
Stunned, Wee Hughie replies, "Good grief! Can it whistle, too?"
Top answer
WEE HUGHIE'S GOLDFISH Wee Hughie was in the garden filling in a hole when his English neighbour peered over the fence. ' The English neighbour was very concerned. '
- WEE HUGHIE'S GOLDFISH Wee Hughie was in the garden filling in a hole when his English neighbour peered over the fence.
- ' The English neighbour was very concerned.
- '
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4 Answers
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WEE HUGHIE'S GOLDFISH
Wee Hughie was in the garden filling in a hole when his English neighbour peered over the fence. Interested in what the mad man was up to, he politely asked, 'What are you doing there, Hughie?'
'My goldfish died,' replied Wee Hughie tearfully without looking up, 'and I've just buried him.'
The English neighbour was very concerned. 'That's an awfully
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Wee Hughie's Girlfriend
Wee Hughie adored and loved his girlfriend, Lorraine, to whom he was engaged to be married. Wedding plans were well underway and he was looking forward to spending the rest of his lfe with Lorraine.
However, a beutiful young lady, called Clearly, came to work in his glen and they found that they got on together very well and as time went by, Wee Hughie
Wee Hughie adored and loved his girlfriend, Lorraine, to whom he was engaged to be married. Wedding plans were well underway and he was looking forward to spending the rest of his lfe with Lorraine.
However, a beutiful young lady, called Clearly, came to work in his glen and they found that they got on together very well and as time went by, Wee Hughie
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SCOTTISH FRUITCAKE RECIPE.
You'll need the following:
1 cup of water
1 cup of sugar
4 large brown eggs
2 cups of dried fruit
1 teaspoon of salt
1 cup of brown sugar
Lemon juice
1 cup of nuts
1 bottle of whiskey.
Sample the whiskey to check for quality.
Take a large bowl. Check the whiskey again. To be sure it's t
You'll need the following:
1 cup of water
1 cup of sugar
4 large brown eggs
2 cups of dried fruit
1 teaspoon of salt
1 cup of brown sugar
Lemon juice
1 cup of nuts
1 bottle of whiskey.
Sample the whiskey to check for quality.
Take a large bowl. Check the whiskey again. To be sure it's t
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A Wee scottish guy sitting at a bar, a big thug walks in and hits him to the floor and says "thats a karate chop from Korea"
Later the thug walks up to him and hits him again and says "thats a judo chop from Japan"
The wee scottish guy goes out and a few minutes later returns, smacks the thug on the head and knocks him out, with blood splattered everywhere
And says to t
Later the thug walks up to him and hits him again and says "thats a judo chop from Japan"
The wee scottish guy goes out and a few minutes later returns, smacks the thug on the head and knocks him out, with blood splattered everywhere
And says to t
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