Sales persons Vs. buyers [be my guest]

Question

Hi,In our country suppose that I own a boutique and I am a salesperson. You come into my boutique and buy some clothes.When you want to pay for it I tell you as a compliment :"Be my guest" = (take it for free) = as a complimentThen you say "no thank you very much it's nice of you please take the money." and then I take the money.I want to know whether you hear such compliments from sales persons or not. What expressions do salespeople use for you when you want to buy something from them? Do they use the bold written part? If not then what do they usually say in order to show a compliment or respect the buyer?Or suppose that you go to a bar and have some drinks with your friends. When you are finished and want to pay for the drinks you go to the bar man and say: "Sir how much should we pay?"Then what can the bar man say as a compliment? Is it common if the bar man says to you: "Be my guest"? then you say no thank you very much. For more clarification let me give you a dialogue:In Iran you can imagine this conversation:Customer: Hello sir may I have look at that T-shirt?Salesperson: Sure, here you are.Customer: Thank you. I buy it. How much should I pay sir?Salesperson: Be my guest!?Customer: Thank you very much sir, it's nice of you. How much should I pay?Salesperson: 23$ Ms.Customer: Ok, here you are sir.Salesperson: Thank you. Have a nice day Ms.Customer: Thank you bye.Salesperson: You're welcome. Bye.Source: self made general questionThank you

Rainspeaker · Accepted Answer

Really, this is as much a cultural question as it is a grammatical one. "Be my guest" makes no sense used like that, at least not here in America. Here is a more typical exchange:

Customer: Excuse me, sir -- may I take a look at that t-shirt?
Salesperson: [Absolutely/Sure], here you are. [Or, interchangeably:] Here you go. [Or, just:] Here. [Or:] Sure.
[Customer looks at the shirt for a while.]
Customer: Thanks. I think I'll take this. [Or] Thanks, I'll [take/get] [it/this]. [Or, but this is less idiomatic:] OK, I'd like to [buy/purchase/get] this [optionally: please].
Salesperson: Great choice. I really like this design.
Customer: Yeah, it's pretty nice. How much will this be?
Salesperson: Let me ring you up. So, just this? [OR] [All right / ...etc...] Is there anything else I can help you with?
Customer: Oh, no, thank you. Just this.
Salesperson: OK. That will be $23 [Optionally: please]. [OR] That comes to $23.
[Customer pays.]
Salesperson: Thank you.
Customer: Thank you. Bye!
Salesperson: Have a [great/nice] day!

If you tell an English speaker "Be my guest" when they are asking how much something costs, they will probably not know what you mean. "Be my guest" is only used to grant permission in response to a request. So you could say:
Customer: May I take a look at that t-shirt?
Salesperson: Sure, be my guest.
"How much does this cost" or "How much will this be" is not a request for permission, obviously.

If you actually wanted to say that they could have it without paying, you'd maybe say "Please, you're welcome to it." or "Have it on me." (in this second one, "on me" is used in the sense of "at my expense" -- you can also say, for example, "Tonight, drinks are on Jerry" to mean "Jerry will pay for everyone's drinks tonight"). You could also say "No charge" or "It's on the house." "on the house" is used especially when selling food or drink in a bar or restaurant, and it means "You can have this drink/food/other item at the expense of this shop/restaurant/bar (which we are calling the 'house')."

But since in American culture and, as far as I know, British culture as well, it's not customary to say that a customer can have something for free when you actually want them to pay for it, an American or a Brit would probably take you literally if you said "No charge, you're welcome to it," and just walk out of the shop with the item.

In English, if a salesperson or other customer service worker wants to be extra polite, they will probably ask questions like "Did you find everything all right?", respond emphatically to requests for permission "--May I look at this? --Absolutely, go right ahead!", and wish them a good day. They might also compliment the customer's choice "Great choice / I love this design / this one is really comfortable / that's going to look great on you".

Also, note that "I buy this" is simply wrong. It's the wrong tense and the wrong sense. You could say: "I'm going to buy this," but while that's not technically incorrect, it doesn't really express the intent, which is a request to be sold an item. What you really want is "I'd like to buy this." This is makes more sense. An even more idiomatic way to say it would be "I think I'll take this," with an optional "please" at the end. "Take" is probably more idiomatic than "buy" when expressing an issue of which items you are buying versus which items you are not buying. "I'll take the purple and the green t-shirts, but I think I'll leave the red one." It's pretty generally used at a cash register to indicate what you intend to purchase. "Get" might also, more colloquially, be used in the same manner.

"Ring you up" refers to the action of using a cash register to total the price of goods and accept payment.

Finally, for some reason, it's somewhat rare to hear an English speaking salesperson ever say "You're welcome." They may say "No problem," especially if the customer is thanking them for guiding them to the merchandise. However, if the salesperson has just rung the customer up, he/she is more likely to say "Thank you" in response to the customer's "Thank you." This seems to be a way of saying that it is the customer who has done a favor to the salesperson, and not the other way around.

I hope this was all clear.

KJinCali79 · Answer

The most common expression is "it's on the house," or "compliments of the ___."

Clive · Answer

In our country suppose that I own a boutique and I am a salesperson. You come into my boutique and buy some clothes.
When you want to pay for it I tell you as a compliment :"Be my guest" = (take it for free) = as a compliment
Then you say "no thank you very much it's nice of you please take the money." and then I take the money.

I want to know whether you hear such compliments from sales persons or not. What expressions do salespeople use for you when you want to buy something from them? Do they use the bold written part? If not then what do they usually say in order to show a compliment or respect the buyer?

Or suppose that you go to a bar and have some drinks with your friends. When you are finished and want to pay for the drinks you go to the bar man and say: "Sir how much should we pay?"
Then what can the bar man say as a compliment? Is it common if the bar man says to you: "Be my guest"? then you say no thank you very much.

I've never had a sales person offer to give me an item free. It's not part of my cultural tradition.

For more clarification let me give you a dialogue:

In Iran you can imagine this conversation:

In my culture, we do not address sales people as Sir or Madam. And it is becoming rather old-fashioned for the sales person to address the customer this way, except for very expensive stores.

Never address someone as simply Ms.
Ms Smith is fine.

I'm going to revise your dialogue. In my experience with Iranian students, Iranian politeness is much more elaborate than it is in Canada.

Customer: Hello, may I have look at that T-shirt?
Salesperson: Sure, here you are.
Customer: Thank you. I'll take it. How much is it?
Salesperson: $23, please.
Customer: (gives money)
Salesperson: Thank you.
Customer: Thank you

KJinCali79 · Answer

Clive, perhaps the dialogue does not fit with your experience, but would not find this uncommon in the U.S. in other circumstances.

For example, say I've eaten a meal at a restaurant and things didn't go well with the food preparation, so the waiter sends over a dessert, "compliments of the chef." Or I've been drinking at a bar, and the bartender gives us an extra round "on the house." And yes, even in the retail store, perhaps I'm buying many items and the salesperson throws in something extra "complimentary."

Although, I will add that in these situations I described, the offer is intended as final, and the customer would not offer to pay for it. The back-and-forth of offering to pay is something I would only encounter with my close friends and family, whereby we all offer to pay until someone finally lets someone else pay.

CalifJim · Answer

sb70012In our country suppose that I own a boutique and I am a salesperson. You come into my boutique and buy some clothes.When you want to pay for it I tell you as a compliment :"Be my guest" = (take it for free) = as a compliment Then you say "no thank you very much it's nice of you please take the money." and then I take the money.

Assuming this is a typical interchange in your country, I have to say that this courtly dance of politeness would never occur in the U.S. I have the feeling that this formula is a sort of fake bargaining, perhaps a holdover from times when every such transaction was through real bargaining, and that by "Be my guest" you mean something more like "Please suggest a price yourself" or like "Whatever you believe it's worth".

sb70012I want to know whether you hear such compliments from sales persons or not.

Compliments from salespersons are not a typical part of American life unless the customer seems to have a lot of money he is willing to part with, something very expensive is being sold, and the salesperson works on commission.

sb70012What expressions do salespeople use for you when you want to buy something from them? Do they use the bold written part? If not then what do they usually say in order to show a compliment or respect the buyer?

They don't say "Be my guest." They don't say "Take it. It's free." (Those aren't compliments, by the way. Compliments are usually personal remarks concerning, for example, how nice looking the person is or how nice his or her clothes are.) It is not usual here for a salesperson to compliment a buyer. In fact it's quite possible that many potential buyers would be put off by such compliments. Just an ordinary "please" and "thank you" kind of politeness occurs, and not compliments.

sb70012Or suppose that you go to a bar and have some drinks with your friends. When you are finished and want to pay for the drinks you go to the bar man and say: "Sir how much should we pay?" ... Is it common if the bar man says to you: "Be my guest"? then you say no thank you very much.

No. The bartender would say "It's on the house". And then you certainly don't say "No thank you very much". You just say "Thanks" because you have just gotten the drinks for free. And you really don't pay for the drinks. "Be my guest" doesn't come into it anywhere.

CJ

Grammarfreak · Answer

rainspeakerReally, this is as much a cultural question as it is a grammatical one. "Be my guest" makes no sense used like that, at least not here in America. Here is a more typical exchange:

Just a couple of comments....
I completely agree with everything you said. Coming from an observation point of view, the tone of "Be my guest" has the similar effect of "knock yourself out" which comes off as something sarcastic or saying " do what you want " in most English speaking countries. It certainly doesn't sound semantically well connected with the " T-shirt customer" context in discussion. While this usage seemed strange, most learners from non-English speaking countries don't have a true sense of how the language is usage on an idiomatically practical level. They often applied what they learned from school and what they heard from other media, and in the process combined with their own interpretations in their writings. So when they tried to use these phrases in a sentence or context without knowing the real meaning, the syntax may come off as odd or awkward, as in this case.

Rainspeaker · Answer

grammarfreak: I absolutely agree. I didn't mean to shame sb70012 for not knowing the idioms; as I was thinking through ways I would actually have conducted this exchange, I was constantly noticing how odd and non-intuitive the idioms we use are. I just wanted to give a clear sense of what was going on here.

Clive wrote:

In my culture, we do not address sales people as Sir or Madam. And it is becoming rather old-fashioned for the sales person to address the customer this way, except for very expensive stores.

Never address someone as simply Ms.
Ms Smith is fine.

I don't think these are universal, even in North American English. I grew up in Florida, in the US, and I live in the North-East of the US now, and I typically address salespeople as "sir" or "ma'am". Never "madam", though, which is pretty archaic. Actually, I use "sir" and "ma'am" for anyone who I don't know and who is older than me.
Also, I would never call a woman "Ms" by itself, but I've definitely heard older people address young women as "Miss" (note the unvoiced ssss sound rather than the voiced zzzz in "Ms"). It's definitely a marked usage, one that draws attention to itself, but it's still something that native speakers say.

Grammarfreak · Answer

rainspeaker I didn't mean to shame sb70012 for not knowing the idioms;

Acutally, my comments were not about that. In any learning, people make mistakes and that's the naturla part of the process. If I had a dollar for everyting mistake I had made in writing or spoken English 30 years ago when I came to this country, I may have enough money to retire today. I was just sharing my observation as someone who has done through each stage of the learning process, without the aid of the electronic advances at the time by the way. Most immigrants who came to this country with no English background typically would simply be content if they can learn enough to understand and engage in everyday conversation. At least that was how I felt; and for 2 years I made little or no progress because I did not put enough effort in it. I was depressed, at 15 living in a new country with no friend, not being able to read and afraid to go out. Until this day, I still couldn't explain where the motivation came from or what force was at work that changed my life. I was determined to learn and master this langauge. Perhap it was my survival instinct kicking in. At first it seemed impossible and for many times I felt like giving up, but didn't. I kept pushing on, studying 6 hours everyday with my dictionaries, and watching news cast every evening to listen and tried to mimic the speech tone and pattern. As time went on, I actually fell in love with this langauge because I was able to express better than I could with my mother tongue. Today, I am still trying to polish my English and I really want to help the learners along the process.

Sales persons Vs. buyers [be my guest]

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