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Anonymous Posted 15 years ago
Vocabulary

Rewrite the sentence for better flow

The North American Personal Motorsports Marketing Association (NAPMMA), is committed to assist our members, a diverse group of all-terrain vehicles, snowmobiles and personal watercraft dealers achieve their business objectives.
  

Top answer

The North American Personal Motorsports Marketing Association (NAPMMA) is committed to assisting our members, a diverse group of dealers selling all-terrain vehicles, snowmobiles and personal watercraft, achieve their business objectives. -or- The North American Personal Motorsports Marketing Association (NAPMMA) is a diverse group of all-terrain vehicle, snowmobile and personal watercraft dealers. We are committed to assisting our members achieve their business objectives.

— JohnParis

  • The North American Personal Motorsports Marketing Association (NAPMMA) is committed to assisting our members, a diverse group of dealers selling all-terrain vehicles, snowmobiles and personal watercraft, achieve their business objectives.
  • -or- The North American Personal Motorsports Marketing Association (NAPMMA) is a diverse group of all-terrain vehicle, snowmobile and personal watercraft dealers.
  • We are committed to assisting our members achieve their business objectives.
  • I prefer the second example.
  • Hope this helps, John
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1 Answers
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The North American Personal Motorsports Marketing Association (NAPMMA) is committed to assisting our members, a diverse group of dealers selling all-terrain vehicles, snowmobiles and personal watercraft, achieve their business objectives.

-or-

The North American Personal Motorsports Marketing Association (NAPMMA) is a diverse group of all-terrain vehicle, snowmobile and personal
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