Revising a little paragrpah!

Question

Hello!Could anyone, who is a native speaker of English, help me out by telling me if anything sounds a little too "unnatural" as for both syntax or vocabulary in this little paragraoh I wrote? Here it is:"I am currently a postgraduate looking forward to complete my MA in Translation;  enthusiastically seeking an opportunity that will enable me to apply both the knowledge and skills that I have acquired throughout my academic life, as much as to enhance them. I am passionate about my field of work and longing for professional challenges and experience."It's very important that it sounds trully correct. Thank you in advance!

Tabsz · Accepted Answer

I am sorry for my spelling mistakes on the word "paragraph", I am writing in a hurry!

Clive · Answer

A few comments.

"I am
currently a postgraduate << obvious, as you are doing your MA
looking forward << to me, a little too emotional?
to completing my MA in Translation;a semi-colon is not correct, based on what follows here
enthusiastically seeking an opportunity that will enable me to apply both the knowledge and skills that I have acquired throughout my academic life, as much as to enhance them.
I am passionate too emotional?
about my field of work
and longing too emotional? How about 'eager'?
for professional challenges and experience."

( Do you need to specify the languages you translate?)

I'm British. We are reluctant to sound emotional.
.

If I were you, I would make it sound a little less like you want a learning experience and a little more like you want to use all the great knowledge and skills you now have. It's your choice, of course.

Revise and post again, if you wish.

Clive

Tabsz · Answer

Thank you! Quite helpful. I tend for those emotional words, I have noticed (could it be that I am Portuguese? Haha).

For context: This is the summary on the top of my CV. In this case, I am going to try my luck with the European Parliament traineeships. They like us to go there with no previous work experience, hence the focus on my search to learn more and get better. In translation, I work with EN, PT and ES, but that is to be specified furthen on. My revised paragraph will be:

I am looking forward to completing my MA in Translation, enthusiastically seeking an opportunity that will enable me to apply both the knowledge and skills that I have acquired throughout my academic life, as much as to enhance them. I am passionate about my field of work and eager for professional challenges and experience.

Thank you once again,

Ana

Clive · Answer

This time, I'll just edit the grammar.

I am looking forward to completing my MA in Translation, and enthusiastically seeking an opportunity that will enable me to apply both the knowledge and skills that I have acquired throughout my academic life, as much as to enhance them. I am passionate about my field of work and eager for professional challenges and experience.

Good luck, Clive

Tabsz · Answer

Hah! That one escaped me. Thank you very much for you attention.

Regards,
Ana

Revising a little paragrpah!

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