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Lily33 Posted 17 years ago
Grammar

Revise it plz

Hello,

Plz correct the following essay to me since it is talking about personal information.

Best regards

susu

After graduating from Teacher Training Institute in Al-Qadissiyah City in 1994 (but I failed to get an official certificate to submit it to Fulbright because my papers are completely lost because of the frequent lootings my school), for three years I have worked as a teacher at one of Al-Qadissiyah primary schools in the countryside. While I was teaching there, I had noticed the way of violence whether it is physical or spiritual by using language of terrorism that those naive students have achieved from the staff and the manager of this school. I felt pity with those innocent pupils but I did not have the right to change anything because of the dictatorship of the manager who was supported by the government at this time.
From the moment I studied my BA I decided to pull out all the steps and go on as far as I could, hence the MA degree. I had completed my MA in Iraq after the war in 2004 in which I had suffered great deal. At this time, Iraq was full of fear, violence, terrorism, kidnapping and so on. This state of the country was quite dangerous for a girl to develop her abilities and to be someone brilliant and to get bright future. Again terrorism stayed as an obstacle for obtaining our knowledge.
After getting my MA in English Language and Linguistics at 2004, I have taught in the department of English Language at the same university of Al-Qadissiyah where I completed my undergraduate study and did my MA .Over the past four years I have working on different aspects of linguistics. Within present –day pragmatics, I have particular researches in speech act theory , focusing on the social dynamic interaction . My researches are entitled ( ''inviting '' speech act as a commissive – directive hybrid '') and (Linguistic Analysis of Supplication in Standard English and Standard Arabic With Reference to Liturgical Language). This shows that I have an active interest in comparative studies. As for my present and future work in linguistics, I am now concentrating my effects on the political linguistics .My current work is on the notion of confrontational arguments in cold war. I am interested in how the governments use language to construct their institutional identity and legitimate their policies.
Once again terrorism reached to my personal life to take one of my brothers away from his life, family. The terrorists attacked him in the street. They forced him into the boot of a car in Baghdad in 2006. Many families suffered from terrorism in Iraq and in different countries in the world. The usual kidnapping style is for armed militants to drive up with their faces covered to the victim’s house, office or shop, or sometimes corner him on the street. The victim is overpowered, and dumped into the boot. Indeed, fear of being targeted again - and low expectations of getting help from fledgling Iraqi institutions - keeps my family from turning to the police, who are absent from most neighborhoods anyway. Instead, they seek assistance from the only authority visible here - the US military, whose troops aren't trained to deal with crime. But we got nothing , we believe that my brother is died. This sustains me to deal or write about the language of terrorism. The threat of terrorism is supremely catastrophic: It is not just a threat of sudden violent death , it is actually a ‘threat to civilization’, a ‘threat to the very essence of what you do’, a ‘threat to our way of life’, and a threat to ‘the peace of the world’.
  

Top answer

Here you go. It's not perfect, but I wasn't sure about what you meant in a few of your phrases. You should probably try to get someone else to look at it as well.

  • Here you go.
  • It's not perfect, but I wasn't sure about what you meant in a few of your phrases.
  • You should probably try to get someone else to look at it as well.
  • After graduating from the Teacher Training Institute in Al-Qadissiyah City in 1994 (but I failed to get an official certificate to submit it to Fulbright because my papers are completely lost due to the frequent lootings at my school), I worked for three years as a teacher at one of Al-Qadissiyah primary schools in the countryside.
  • While I was teaching there, I noticed the way violence whether physical or spiritual was spread by using the language of terrorism that those naive students had aquired from the staff and the manager of the school.
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2 Answers
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Here you go. It's not perfect, but I wasn't sure about what you meant in a few of your phrases. You should probably try to get someone else to look at it as well.

After graduating from the Teacher Training Institute in Al-Qadissiyah City in 1994 (but I failed to get an official certificate to submit it to Fulbright because my papers are completely lost due to the frequent lootings at my
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Hey, I must say I like a lot what you have written here, congratulations. It's really touching. It makes me think about all these wars we have going on. The best for you.
AnonymousHere you go. It's not perfect, but I wasn't sure about what you meant in a few of your phrases. You should probably try to get someone else to look at it as well.


After graduating

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